The Challenge

It's In Your Heart

2011-11-06T05:53:00.000-08:00

“If you can't feed a hundred people, then just feed one.” Mother Teresa

She was only in 3rd Grade, but she had already learned to be a ‘giver’. (Actually, I think it’s natural and most of us are born that way, we just become desensitized, look outward less and inward more.) She recognized a fellow student in need financially; something the young boy in her classroom whispered to her.

It wasn’t much money she had saved up from Christmas and birthday’s, but she knew she had $80 dollars, and when on the way home from school she told the story of the boy in her class who had a need and she wanted to give him her money, it gives a parent a warm feeling that your daughter’s heart is in the right place. But in the quiet of your mind it can also make you think if you have been so kind. Do I do enough?

I think back on that day, I think back of the child who had put a pair of socks on her Christmas list, and the little girl who asked for a bed. There are so many folks who need US to help. I CHALLENGE myself, my family and you to find a way to help others this holiday season.

Some of us have time to share, some of us have jackets we haven’t worn in years hanging in the closet that can keep someone warm, and there are those of us who have may have a few dollars to spare to help a charitable organization or church feed someone. The objective is getting out and helping; helping someone get through difficult times…….sending a child to school who has eaten a breakfast…..letting strangers know that people do care. Do what you know you should do!

If you read this, I hope it inspires you to help someone, a family, a friend, a stranger. If it does, please pass it on.

May your dreams be filled and blessings shower upon you!

The Potter's Hands

2011-09-18T08:21:00.000-07:00

“One day your life will flash before your eyes. Make sure its worth watching.” Author Unknown

So many ways we live our lives,
You and I and everyone else,
Shaped, influenced, lead to where
We are at today.
Is it the mold of our own hands?

Look at your hands,
Take credit for the work, or
Pass off the results to what
You’ve let others create.
Is it time we’ve become the Potter of
Our Own Lives?

DSM

Just One Pitch

2011-02-06T08:42:00.001-08:00

"Self confidence is the first requisite to great undertakings."
Dr. Samuel Johnson

I can remember it was a warm summer day in our backyard in Plainville, Connecticut on Burnside Avenue. It was getting late in the afternoon and I was playing with my baseball bat and ball. My brother Paul and I had just got done finishing playing and my father had pulled in the driveway from work.

I yelled over to my Dad as he was about to walk into the house, ‘Dad could you come pitch me the ball?” He hesitated and I asked again, although I sensed he wanted to get in and ready for dinner.

He stepped in the yard and I threw him the tennis ball to pitch to me. “Just one pitch,” he said.

The yard from side to side is no more than 20 yards. I was lined up against the fence to the left and he lined up to pitch the ball with the fence to his back on the right side of the yard.

The pitch came in just perfect and I hit if well over his head, over the fence, into our neighbors yard. I figure I was about seven or eight when that happened so the distance of the hit to me then was like hitting it out of Yankee Stadium.

Just one pitch. My father went in, we all had dinner, and I was the proudest kid in the world at that moment. So proud to show my father how good I can hit.

I look back at my life and that is one of the moments that stick out. The homeruns I hit in little league and high school are vague memories compared to that little hit only he and I saw.

Those are the moments that shape us and those are the moments we help shape others. It’s simple little successes that help gain our confidence and encourage us to keep moving forward. It’s the time we take to help others realize their potential, encourage them, and help them succeed; sometime unknowingly.

We all have the opportunity in our lives to ask for that pitch to be thrown, or to throw that pitch. Happiness and Success in life comes from small meaningful accomplishments that strengthen our self-esteem.

Swing your bat! Pitch the Ball

THE EMBRACE

2010-12-26T08:17:00.001-08:00

Sometimes it's better to put love into hugs than to put it into words. ~Author Unknown

THE EMBRACE

I can’t remember where I was, but the news on television caught my eye a few weeks ago. The scene has played over and over in my mind the past several weeks. A soldier, wounded by an improvised explosive device (IED) in Afghanistan, had just walked down the steps of an airplane where he was greeted by his family. As the news made light of the continued war, my focus was on the hug this young soldier had with his father.

It wasn’t so much it was a father-son hug more than a mother-son, mother-daughter, father-daughter, but it was the hug itself. It was how I knew how thankful they were to see one another again. How they loved one another. It was one of those defining moments when you look into someone’s eyes knowing that opportunity may not have been. The swell of emotions, the reflections of the past, when the heart swells like a rising tide, ready to pour out love that has been contained by time, or the thinking you have all the time in the world.

So it was in that hug, that embrace, between the father and son, that was another reminder to me that I shouldn’t, we shouldn’t, wait to tell or show someone we care. We shouldn’t wait to embrace them as if they would never be seen again, holding them near to the heart, just letting that loving energy flow, bringing peace and joy to the soul.

God created us to love, love Him and love one another.

Don’t wait

"Run it Out!"

2010-09-09T05:47:00.000-07:00

“Keep your dreams alive. Understand to achieve anything requires faith and belief in yourself, vision, hard work, determination, and dedication. Remember all things are possible for those who believe.” Gail Devers

It was about 8pm in early March as I was leaving my daughter’s softball game at Clear Lake High School when I suddenly stopped in my tracks at the site of an unknown high school athlete that started a flood of thoughts. Across the street, just outside the running track was a high school athlete practicing the pole vault in the dark with only the light of a street lamp. The thought of this kids dedication to get better and practice at a late hour after school in the dark impressed me deeply. How could this kid not achieve his goals in life with a work effort like he displayed and a cool breezing night, alone, with only himself, the pole, and the goal to improve his abilities?

On the drive home, and hours afterward, the thoughts of this kid, his determination, and how it relates to being successful in life made me think about how some of us are fortunate enough to be exposed to certain events early in life that stay with us and help us realize our potential.

On the baseball field, I can’t tell you how many times I was told to ‘run it out’. Whether it was a sharp ground ball back to the pitcher with the chances of making it safely to first minimal, or a slow grounder to short where you had the chance to beat it out for a single, it was always drilled in me to ‘run it out’. Run you fastest, no soft jogs, give it your best with the hopes something will happen in the play which will allow you to make it safely to first.

‘Run it out’, ‘practice as if you were playing’, ‘visualize success’ are common themes that condition athletes minds for success. These are the thoughts that separate those who realize their capabilies from those who seem not to get anywhere in life.

As we look at ourselves, our co-workers, family members and friends, the effort we see people put in what they do is sometimes pretty evident in where they are at. There are those who feel like they are accomplishing goals, while others are somewhat miserable wondering how to get from here to there. The answer lies within each person’s decision to ‘run it out’ or lightly jog down to first base if you think out automatically. It’s in the effort; the continued unceasing effort.

I will never forget that image of the lonely teenager practicing the pole vault on a cool chilly night with only the light of a nearby street light. It stirs the memory and emotions of ‘desire’ and ‘giving it all you got’. It’s about the passion to do you best, improve, and improve from there. Whether it’s improving a relationship, business, or other personal goals, if you don’t learn to ‘run it out’ you’ll watch the game.

Focus

2010-01-31T06:49:00.000-08:00

"Your mind will overcome anything. That is, anything that matters to you".

An early morning trip to the gym today ended up more of a exercise of my mind than my body. As I was stepping away on the Stairmaster, in front of me was a fairly heavy guy on a treadmill. I didn’t notice it at first, but when I looked over at him the second time I noticed a small golf type towel covering the readout of the electronics. I didn’t really know why he had it there, but could only theorize.

If any of you have been on these machines that show how far you’ve gone, how many calories you’ve burned, or the minutes remaining, time literally stands still. 40 minutes can seem like a day. After you’re on the machine for 3 minutes it seems like an hour. It’s not so much the physical aspect of the workout but the mental side of it.

I’d bet a few bucks this guy was blocking the readings to free his mind of where he was at on his path to his goal, focus on whatever he was listening to coming from those earphones, and when he reached his time or the mileage the machine would beep at him.

Life is so much like that little lesson from the treadmill. We want to reach the destination, our goal, so fast, we get disappointed with the slow progress it takes to get there. Whether it’s health, wealth, education, relationships, or the spirit of God running through your heart, you don’t get there in a leap, but the constant treading ahead, staying focused, being confident where you are going, and not giving up. We’ve all heard the axiom ‘anything worthwhile takes time’; it’s so true.

Keep your mind focused on you goals. Review them daily. Carry index cards around with them. Refresh the want and the mind will guide you there. Then, invest some sweat equity!

There are people in your life, you family, friends, and coworkers, who want to help you reach you goals. Share them with those in your ‘inner circle’ you can trust. They can help be that ‘towel’ to keep you mind focused where you are headed versus where you are.

Tomorrow is a new month, another new beginning. Keep it going or get it going.

dm

My Wish

2010-01-01T06:14:00.000-08:00

HAPPY NEW YEAR!! I can't write it any better than Rascal Flatts have done it in this song. Lyrics below and link to the song. Have a super year!

Rascal Flatts : My Wish Lyrics
Songwriters: Steele, Jeffrey; Robson, Steve

I hope that the days come easy and the moments pass slow,
And each road leads you where you want to go,
And if you're faced with a choice, and you have to choose,
I hope you choose the one that means the most to you.
And if one door opens to another door closed,
I hope you keep on walkin' till you find the window,
If it's cold outside, show the world the warmth of your smile,

But more than anything, more than anything,
My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
Your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
And while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish.

I hope you never look back, but ya never forget,
All the ones who love you, in the place you left,
I hope you always forgive, and you never regret,
And you help somebody every chance you get,
Oh, you find God's grace, in every mistake,
And you always give more than you take.

But more than anything, yeah, and more than anything,
My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
Your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
And while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish.

My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
Your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
And while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish.

This is my wish
I hope you know somebody loves you
May all your dreams stay big

(listen to the song by clicking on the title of the blog, MY WISH, at the top.)

Because I Thought You Knew

2009-11-28T08:06:00.000-08:00

I didn't say 'thank you',
'cause I thought you knew.

I didn't say 'I love you',
'cause I thought you knew.

I didn't say 'I missed you',
'cause I thought you knew.

If I only knew I'd be without you.

I lost my chance to let you know,
I lost my chance to let my feelings show.

My biggest regret, and I've had few,
is not letting my heart communicate to you.

So I say this prayer, with you in mind,
that these simple words to you they will find.

"Thank you GOD, you've blessed me so,
for such a special person my love did grow.
Watch her always while we are apart,
'til that time I can unload my heart."

by Dave Myslenski © 2009

Happiness

2009-11-05T05:22:00.000-08:00

"But what is happiness except the simple harmony between a man and the life he leads?" - Albert Camus

In the book, "To See the World in a Grain of Sand," C.L. James tells the fable of a wise old cat that notices a kitten chasing its tail. Here is a short outline :

"Why are you chasing your tail so?" asked the wise old cat. The kitten replied, "I have learned that th...e best thing for a cat is happiness, and happiness is my tail. Therefore, I am chasing it; and when I catch it, I shall have happiness."

The wise old cat said, "My son, I too have paid attention to the problems of the universe. I too have judged that happiness is in my tail. But, I noticed that whenever I chase after it, it keeps running away from me, and when I go about my business, it just seems to come after me wherever I go."

The One-legged Grackle

2009-10-17T04:30:00.000-07:00

“You are the only person on earth who can use your ability.” Zig Ziglar

"I would not have noticed if I didn't keep looking." I said to myself afterward deep in thought.

There were on a few common grackles on the grass pecking away on the ground as I noticed them as I was seated in the car. They were all feverishly pecking through the turf eating up whatever they can find on on a small parcel of lawn.

My eye caught one of the birds for some reason. Maybe the uneveness of it's movements compared to the others; the hopping from spot to spot with it's head up versus walking with it's head down and beak in the grass like the others.

This grackle, it's blue-bronze feathers, shining and full as the other five or so, had only one leg.

Within seconds after watching the one-legged grackle work for it's food as hard or harder than the others a loud noise scared the volery of grackles and almonst in perfect sync they flapped their wings and flew eastward.

That one-legged grackle had to work harder than the others in his fleet. Where the others were covering the ground with their head constantly down, this one had to pull his head up for balance and hop from spot to spot.

Did that grackle know he was different or did he just know what he needed to do to survive, to be successful? Looking at them all, it appeared he was as healthy as the others in his little group.

Why do we as God-gifted beings look for excuses not to be successful? Why do we hang labels and feel we need to take care of those who may be a little less fortunate that the person next to him or her? Why has our society allowed people to not work hard and realize their full potential, which ultimately weakens them even further.

Don't mistaken me, there are people who can't care for themselves, and we should. My point is this - we are not equal in talent, ability, information, intelligence, and physical characterists. All of us must work hard at different levels to be successful. We can't give ourselves excuses or enable others to lose their vitaily, their force, because we've labeled them.

When those birds took off at the bang of that door, and when I watched the one-legged grackle flap and fly, he was no different than the rest. God gave those birds the gift to fly and soar, and that grackle, with that one-leg, flew as well as those in his volery.

We all have that power in us. We have been built to soar in our own ways and fly high. We shouldn't expect anything less from ourselves, our friends, or family. It's the effort we put into life that rewards us emotionally, knowing we gave it all.

No excuses!! Take a lesson from the one-legged grackle and work hard; work harder. Hop along, scratch it out!! You were built by God to fly, to soar. Don't think anything less. Now go!!

Four Cents

2009-05-10T06:58:00.000-07:00

“Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things.” - Robert Brault

It was an early morning weekday and I was headed to our corporate office in Houston. I pulled in the convenience store about 5:30 a.m. to get a cup of coffee for my hour ride. As I exited my vehicle and headed up to the front doors with the illuminated Valero sign overhead, I glanced down at the curb from the parking space to the front of the building.

My eye caught four pennies on the pavement. I stepped over them and continued in. As I was headed toward the coffee pots I felt bad I didn’t stop immediately and pick them up. I always do. Not so much for one penny, but more for picking something up that says “In God We Trust”.

For whatever time it took to get my coffee and pay for it the thought of not picking up the coins would not escape my mind.

As I left the store I went back to the spot I saw them and they were still there. I bent over to pick them up and as I did I also saw a dime several inches from the pennies. Wow, fourteen cents!

As I was driving to work I thought about this episode. How I saw something of little value but paid attention to it, and doing so, I found something of greater value.

It made me think about how life is similar. How many of us don’t take the time to notice the little things and unknowingly miss the bigger things.

If you don’t focus on a little problem, oh, how many of us know it can grow to a big problem. If you don’t focus on a little opportunity, for sure it will never grow into a big opportunity. If you don’t recognize you kids for the little things they do, they’ll never be encouraged to take on the bigger things in life.

Little things are important. Recognize them. Learn to see them. Act on them!

Happy Mother's Day!!

Somewhere Over the Rainbow

2009-02-15T06:35:00.000-08:00

"Happiness is as a butterfly which, when pursued, is always beyond our grasp, but which if you will sit down quietly, may alight upon you." Nathaniel Hawthorne

I’ve always been fascinated with the Wizard of Oz. Just a great story and it amazes me how well it was made in 1939 when it wasn’t long before that year movie-goers were watching black and white silent films.

Dorothy dreams and ‘sings’ of somewhere over the rainbow. Part of the lyrics goes like this;

Someday I'll wish upon a star
And wake up where the clouds
Are far behind me
Where troubles melt like lemon drops
Away above the chimney tops that's where you'll find me

I look at some people today who are singing the same song in their life. They’re wishing for all their troubles to melt away. Constantly looking for happiness outside themselves through a different job, a bigger house, a different spouse or a different land. Always changing but never finding happiness. I have to believe they have seen the most watched movie ever.

Dorothy, wishing for a better place, only invited more problems into her life. She spent the entire time trying to get back to where she was after realizing what was really important. Dorothy had to deal with evil witches and flying monkeys. She was duped in believing in the Magical Oz could solve her and her friends problems.

How often do people bring more problems in their lives by chasing happiness? How many people divorce for a new relationship only to find the next one no better? How many people do you know that are continually chasing happiness and never finding it?

Learning to be content is as important as assuring you body gets the proper nutrition. Like Dorothy, learn you can’t chase happiness. Learn there’s no place like home. Learn to be content with yourself.

Chase dreams for the right reasons, find happiness in yourself.

Now, stand up, put your feet together, click your heals together and say, ‘there’s no place like home.”

Don’t be like the little kitten who was told the happiness was at the end of his tail. The poor kitten spent hours each day going in circles trying to catch it. After endless days of not catching it, the kitten went to the wiser, older cat and asked her how come she didn’t chase her tail. The wise cat told the little kitten that her tail goes wherever she does, she doesn’t have to chase it.

Bookends of Life

2009-01-25T07:24:00.000-08:00

“In the evening of our life, we will be judged on love.”

Her angelic face with wide opened baby-blue eyes shouted joy and wonderment as she was playing with soap bubbles on a sunny day. Her head was adorned with a princesses tiara, sitting atop wavy blonde hair. Her arms extended with hands open, she appeared to be trying to capture a bubble without bursting it. She was only about 3 to 4 years as I could tell from the picture. Thoughts of the innocence of youth came to my mind. How young children know nothing but to be loved and love as their go from infancy to early childhood.

The near billboard size picture of Nola Ochs in her cap & gown at her graduation ceremony caught my eye. The wrinkles of her age, the grayness in her hair, were almost unnoticeable contrasted against the smile and warmth in her eyes. Her college graduation had to be one of the happiest moments, and biggest accomplishments in her life. She was 95 in 2007 when she graduated.

Seeing both those pictures on the same day, Nola’s at the airport and the young girl’s in the hotel elevator, made me think about the ‘bookends of lives’. How between the wonderment of youth and the wisdom of age many of us tend to wander, discontent, looking for answers, and failing to enjoy the moment. Through expectations others put on us, those put upon ourselves, and everyday responsibility our tendency is look outside ourselves to find happiness when true happiness is within.

The child’s simple view at life and the wisdom of the ages should be directional beacons on how to live our lives; simple, thankful, respectful, caring, hopeful, not wishing you would have done something in life you always wanted to do, regretting time not spend with friends and family, grateful to see another day, and as Leo Buscaglia put it…”living, loving, and learning.”

My challenge is to keep the child alive and learn the lessons of those who have walked before me. Live with love, wonderment, and the wisdom to separate the important from the necessary.

NOTE: You can do a key word search on NOLA OCHS and read about her record breaking accomplishment of being the oldest person to get a college degree. Amazing!! The irony is many of us think life has passed us bye.

Realizations

2008-12-21T08:50:00.000-08:00

"There can be hope only for a society which acts as one big family, not as many separate ones." Anwar El Sadat

On Friday I stopped by a local church to see if there was something I could do to help a family in need. I had to build up a little nerve to go into a local Seabrook church and ask to speak with the pastor. After riding by one, I came to the second and it was still vacated due to Hurricane Ike. I swung back around and went to the one I already passed.

As I parked my car I noticed Kroger was just a walk away. Not having any money in my pocket, I figured I’d see how I could help, go to the Kroger ATM and return back with a cash donation.

As I walked in a sweet elderly lady, I’d say she was in her late 70’s, met me at the door. I asked her if the pastor was in to speak with and she said no. Not knowing what I wanted, she kindly directed me to the receptionist.

Usually I don’t have a problem with words coming out of my mouth, but this time I did. Emotions in me were pretty high. With tears welling up in my eyes I asked the receptionist if there was people in the community in need where I can make a donation. She went on to say, “Most people are going to Target and Walmart and getting gift cards.” Intuitively I knew where she was going. She continued, “That way we can give them to the parents to buy gifts for their kids.”

I responded I was really looking to help people with food to make sure they eat. She made it clear that they had plenty of food in the building next door. I said thanks, and left.

It wasn’t I don’t care about kids getting toys for Christmas, but I wanted to make sure people aren’t hungry and help those with more immediate needs.

I called the Interfaith Caring Ministry to see if they were open. A few years back I donated time delivering groceries for them every third Saturday. I knew as part of their ministry they were putting food on peoples’ tables regularly. They covered more ground that just the town of Seabrook, but I knew they were helping people with their immediate needs.

I got some cash, drove over to their facility, and dropped off the money. The woman was very thankful telling me this would help buy meat. What caught me off guard was while I was there a family was there getting some food. As I walked out to my car, I was overcome by another wave of emotion, tears, and a heaviness in my heart, knowing that many people are out there needing help and a feeling I can being doing more to help.

I told Lori last night I’d like to make something up symbolizing those Pair of Socks. Each day I need to be reminded to be thankful and helpful.

A Pair of Socks

2008-12-14T06:50:00.000-08:00

“If you can't feed a hundred people, then just feed one.”

Mother Teresa

A few Christmas' ago, when Rebecca was still in elementary school, Lori volunteered to help a low income area neighboring community school raise Christmas gifts for kids in the same grade as Rebecca. The school had the kids fill out their 'list' of what they would like for Christmas and it was then provided to Lori for her and her team of volunteers to try and fill.

Every Christmas I can't help think back a couple of things on that list. One girl asked for a new pair of socks. Another asked for a bed. Yeah, a pair socks. Imagine that?

Those are those moments in your life that make you stop and think. Think to be thankful, and think that there are people out there struggling. With today's economic slowdown I know there are people out there with needs, maybe even struggling to feed their family this Christmas.

I CHALLENGE myself, and my family, to do something this season that will help someone or a family in need directly and indirectly. To open our eyes, ears, arms, minds, and hearts to those in need.

If only a pair of socks can brighten a child's day, I should be able at least to brighten their holiday season.

Cold Soup - A Recipe for Happiness

2008-12-07T08:16:00.000-08:00

At the end of your life, you will never regret not having passed one more test, not winning one more verdict, or not closing one more deal. You will regret time not spent with a husband, a friend, a child, or a parent.

-- Barbara Bush

Cold Soup!…..I will get to it a little later and why I titled this Cold Soup.

This is my forty-somethingish blog entry. In writing these moments of life and thoughts about them they’ve for the most part been experiences or thoughts involving just me. This one is a little different for a couple of reasons 1) I wasn’t the only one experiencing this moment, and 2) the moment touched me deeply. With that said, writing this is not that easy because I know in words I can never truly convey what was experienced.

Thursday night seventeen of us from Total Safety, spouses included, met for dinner at the Mockingbird Bistro in Houston to honor Charlie Ripoll’s, a VP with us, for his 30th anniversary for service with the company. This was not only a salute to Charlie, but also to recognize and thank his wife Luisa. As we all know and the saying goes, ‘behind every great man is a great woman.’

It’s hard to write about Charlie, he is the kind of person you have to experience. New Orleans raised, speaks with a little cajun-drawl, Charlie embodies the spirit of the company. He’s the guy that pumps you up and when you leave his office you have more energy than when went into it. His heart is bigger than the State of Texas. He’s compassionate, a great mentor, and a beautiful soul.

Prior to dinner, our leader, Dave Fanta ceremoniously thanked Charlie and his wife for their 30 years. He whole-heartedly thanked Charlie for his important contributions to the organization and thanked Luisa for the support she has given him over the years.

As Charlie got up and spoke the appetizers were being served. A few had a crab special, a couple salads and I had onion soup. We were respectful and did not touch our plates to focus on what Charlie had to say, although Charlie, being considerate as always said for us to go ahead and start. We respectfully would not.

Charlie got up and spoke, thanking Dave for the support he has received from him and others. You see, in life’s twists and turns, things get thrown at us. Several months ago Luisa, while walking across a street, was hit by a car and suffered serious injuries. These injuries were so serious her life was endangered and when it was known she would make it, how well would she recover was a concern. The past year has been pretty tough on them, Charlie and Luisa have weathered the greatest part of the storm with their strong faith, love, love from family and friends, and prayers. And as you listen to Charlie talk and be thankful his support, it was moving.

Charlie went all around the table, thanked and complimented his co-workers only as Charlie could do, saying meaningful positive words about everyone. And if you met Charlie you’d notice one thing, he says more with less said. You know Charlie’s heart by looking into his eyes. When he looks at you he tells you he cares. He doesn’t need to say much to know he cares.

Charlie ended his thanks by thanking his wife. While standing at the end of the table, he looked down at his wife who was sitting to his left. And with everything in his heart he publicly thanked her for being there. Through thick and thin he thanked her, giving us examples of her steadfastness, support, and love throughout their relationship. It was very moving. Moving!

It was time to eat our appetizers and there was my soup. Cold onion soup. Anyone who has ever eaten out with me knows how picky I can be and I hate cold soup. There was no complaining. In fact I really didn’t care. What I just experienced was more important than soup. But I realized something else.

When I ate the soup I wasn’t focused on the temperature, I was focused on the taste. It was the best onion soup I ever ate. I enjoyed the richness of the taste.

As I think about life and that soup, how often do we not really focus on what is important and get hung up on outside things. Do we miss the taste because we focus on the temperature? Life is the taste, not the temperature.

The substance of life is what nourishes us, that which is important. As we sat around the table eating our dinner, what really nourished us was not the food, but the sharing of our spirit and soul, our compassion for one another.

We are a great company because of the soul of our company, because of people like Charlie Ripoll. I am a better person because of people like Charlie Ripoll. He nourishes my soul.

And when we can really understand this, to enjoy the taste of life, to understand how we are really nourished, we can live much happier lives. I challenge my daughter every Saturday when I see her leave for work teaching gymnastics, to ‘make a difference in someone’s life today’. To encourage that kid and make them feel better for the rest of the day. I guess I can say ‘go nourish someone.’

A bunch of people are starving out there……..we can make a difference.

Solitary Man

2008-11-29T06:20:00.001-08:00

"The quiet and solitary man apprehends the inscrutable. He seeks nothing, holds to the mean, and remains free from entanglements." I Chang

Thanksgiving morning my daughter Rebecca and I were driving around Seabrook evaluating the progress on rebuilding some of our favorite restaurants damaged from Hurricane Ike. We spotted Slim. (See my September 13 post.)

Life's Lessons

2008-11-22T15:44:00.000-08:00

People living deeply have no fear of death. ~Anaiïs Nin, Diary, 1967

I was at Houston Hobby Airport on Tuesday travelling to Memphis. I always give myself plenty of time and was sitting near the gate getting my laptop out to answer some emails when a gentleman, looking a few years older than me, sat down next to me. He needed to use the other receptacle to charge up his cell phone.

I said hello and he politely said hello back. I say that because it’s amazing these days how some people will not respond. He saw Total Safety on my shirt and asked what our company did. After I explained our business to him I asked him what he did. He told me he owned three restaurants in the Little Rock area.

I asked him what he was doing in Houston. He told me he had come down to the Houston Medical Center for a second opinion. He had been diagnosed with a non-operable cancer and was told he had six months to a year to live. He has two boys in high school and his wife is a school teacher.

As he talked I thought about my Uncle Kenny who in his mid-50’s died within months of being diagnosed with lung cancer and the lyrics from Tim McGraw’s song ‘Live Like You are Dying’ started playing in my head.

One comment he made that has been on my mind the last five days was “You work so hard to get ahead you don’t realize how far behind you’ve gotten.” He was talking about how he focused on growing his businesses and how time consuming the restaurant business was. And even though he considered himself moderately successful he didn’t realize how little time he spent with his family until a couple of weeks ago when he was diagnosed with cancer. He finished by saying, “I always thought I’d have the time in the future.”

I am not one that’s usually at a loss for words, but I couldn’t think of much to say. I mainly listened, asked a few questions, and fought the tears back. What could I say?

It was time for me to line up for the Southwest flight. I finally introduced myself as Dave so I can get his name. His name was Bobby. I shook his hand, quietly said our good-byes and I got in line.

“You work so head to get ahead you don’t realize how far behind you’ve gotten.”

Only Two Bucks

2008-11-15T09:48:00.001-08:00

“Have the courage to say no. Have the courage to face the truth. Do the right thing because it is right. These are the magic keys to living your life with integrity.”

W. Clement Stone

“ONLY TWO BUCKS”

Earlier this week my daughter Sarah, a freshman in college, sent me a text message to my phone. I rarely get emails or texts from her, so I thought it must have been important.

She had texted me, “Dad, I was paying for some paint palettes at the school store and the elderly lady rang me up for one but I had three. I told her I had three and she thanked me, telling me not many people would be so honest.”

I texted her back, “That’s the way to live your life.”

She promptly texted me back, “Yeah, it was only two bucks but I would have felt so bad.”

‘Only two bucks….’ Two bucks doesn’t buy much, today a gallon of gas thank God, and in Sarah’s case two cheap paint palettes. But look at what she would have sold for two bucks…..honesty, integrity, and character. You can’t buy them back for a million bucks, and a guilty conscience is a heavy burden. How something so little can be so big.

The simple things we do in life form the foundation of who we are, and who we are becoming. Ten years from today I’ll be a different person, a better person, and I’ll look back and remember this two dollar lesson.

I hope my daughters do as well.

Memories

2008-11-01T09:30:00.001-07:00

“Memory is a way of holding on to the things you love, the things you are, the things you never want to lose.” - Kevin Arnold

Have you ever had a moment where out of the blue a memory from the past has come to you mind initiated by an external stimulus?

A song, perfume, cologne? The cool brisk morning temperature reminding you of going to school? Looking at a pile of leaves and remember playing in them? The smell of a turkey cooking and reminders of days when all you family was around?

Instantaneous recall of events which are tied to our senses.

Do you have them? I do, and it seems the memories that come back to me are always good ones. And I wonder if other people are affected the same way. I wonder if we are designed for happiness and our minds ability to recall pleasant events is a way of releasing endorphins to pick our attitudes up and keep our thinking in a positive light.

In a world where are constantly bombarded by negative events in the media, and listen to chronic complaints from others of how bad things are or how mistreated they are our how unfair life is, I believe our mind is trying to tell us that life is good and enjoy the moment. One day, not too far down the road, today will be the past, and that song, smell, or other memory recalling event will trigger a thought….I want that thought to be as good as the one’s I have now.

Focus on staying positive and enjoying NOW! Live…really live!!

Good memories being made watch Rebecca's Volleyball team play well.........

How is He Today?

2008-09-13T06:38:00.000-07:00

“The one who understands does not speak; the one who speaks does not understand”
Chinese Proverb

As I was watching Hurricane Ike spin into and begin to ravage the Houston area and our home in Seabrook from a quaint little restaurant and bar in Destin, Florida I couldn't help think about one of Seabrook's residents.

I don't know him, just seen him over the last 12 years since we've moved to Texas back in 1996. He rides his bicycle around town loaded with bags and stuff. He dresses in a heavy wool coat and wears a heavy hat with flaps that fold over the ears, the type a duck hunter would wear. It could be 95 degrees out and you'll still see him dressed with the winter wear. With a grey beard, weather worn face, I'd say he is about 65 years old.

I didn't know his name until I was talking to my daughter about him last night, mentioning I was wondering how he was doing. She knew his name. Slim. Slim somewhat reminds me of a guy who rode a three wheel bike around my hometown of Plainville, Connecticut. His name was Joe, we called him Joe-Joe. (Hope he is still riding his bike.) He often would turn down our street while we were playing baseball or football on the road and he would talk with us.

Nicest guy in the world Joe-Joe. He couldn't drive as he did some mental retardation that limited what he could do. So, as a kid growing up you understood why he rode his trike.

As for Slim, I don't know his situation. I hear he is married with a child and has plenty of money. I hear he will not talk to anyone.

As I wait for news on how bad we were flooded, I think of Slim. I hope he made it out okay. I hope to say hello to him one day. At least I hope to see him on that bike one day soon.

I See You Now

2008-08-31T09:50:00.000-07:00

Be an angel to someone else whenever you can, as a way of thanking God for the help your angel has given you.
~Quoted in The Angels' Little Instruction Book by Eileen Elias Freeman, 1994

During our lives we have been exposed to, are exposed to, and will be exposed to dealing with circumstances that may lead us to question WHY? WHY is this happening to me? WHY is this happening to my friend?

We see people truly suffer from serious health issues, an untimely death of a loved one, starvation, and severe disabilities to name a few. WHY we sometimes ask. And then, we pray. Maybe.

My cousin’s Pat and Lori were born one year apart, two and three years before me. Both were born with epidermolysis bullosa (EB). Epidermolysis bullosa (EB) is a rare genetic disease characterized by the presence of extremely fragile skin and recurrent blister formation, resulting from minor mechanical friction or trauma. An estimated 1 out of every 50,000 live births are affected with some type of EB. Our family never experienced this condition before.

I’ve heard my Uncle Ken and Aunt Joan were told their children probably would not live past the age of five due to the severity of the condition. That due to the blisters that would develop dehydration of the body was a major concern of the doctors and specialists.

Well, Pat and Lori lived well into their 30’s before their bodies just couldn’t hold up anymore, both passing away in the mid –90’s. As I reflect back, I see how the love of my Aunt Joan and Uncle Ken gave Pat & Lori the strength and mental toughness to accomplish what they did. Both graduated high school at the top of their class. Both had full-time jobs after school. And Pat spent some time as a broadcaster on Central Connecticut State Universities radio station.

I am sure no one will know the pains suffered, in the heart, the mind, and the body of another. No one will ever know what drives someone to get up every morning in pain, with blisters breaking, headed to work to prove he can do it but still feel ridicule from co-workers. Pat was a courageous man. I could write so much just on the courage of my cousins, especially Pat who I spent more time with. But, that story is for another day. Today I go back to the ‘WHY’.

‘WHY’ something happens or conditions exist, should lead us to ask the ‘HOW’ and ‘WHAT’. HOW do I respond to it and WHAT can I do. We may know someone in our community or family and see something catastrophic happen and ask WHY, ‘WHY THEM GOD?’ What good does that thinking really do? What we should be asking is ‘HOW I can help?’ the situation and ‘WHAT can I do?’

Do you look away from someone with a disability or look that person straight in the eye, smile and ask them how they are doing, treating them like everyone else? Do you know a neighbor whose house burned down, they lost everything, and you feel sorry for them wondering what they are going to do? Or do you do something to help them?

Life is a spiritual test. We encounter suffering regularly, some of us see it and act on it, some see it and ignore it, and other are blind to it.

How many times in my life have I been blind or ignored to someone's affliction where I could have opened my eyes and heart and reacted differently?

How I pray I am given the opportunities to act differently.

You see, I believe, that in our lives we are given the opportunity to show compassion. It’s not about feeling sorry or pity, but doing something, however small, in a way the suffering may be alleviated. It may be as little as moment where you bring a smile to someone’s face. That smile itself may make a difference in someone’s day.

As I look back on my cousins lives, and if I really feel the need to answer the WHY, it’s they suffered to make me a better person. Their purpose here was to allow our family the opportunity to be more compassionate and grow stronger. To teach us how a loving extended family and a few good friends can keep everyone strong. To teach me to treat everyone the same, regardless of their situation, and not feel sorry for them.

Opportunities present themselves to us everyday. Make yourself aware of them and act.

NOTE: My cousins, Pat and Lori, outside Fenway Park.

Life's Thought Provoking Moments

2008-07-06T07:50:00.000-07:00

“The day the child realizes that all adults are imperfect, she becomes an adolescent; the day she forgives them, she becomes an adult; the days she forgives herself, she becomes wise.”

Those defining moments in life…..the birth of a child, the death of a loved one, a marriage, and in this moment in my life Sarah’s high school graduation. It’s these moments in our lives where we wonder where the time has gone and reflect on how we have spent it.

I think it’s these moments in life the core of our inner being is touched and we are given the opportunity to redirect our lives to spend our time more wisely. Like a sailboat with nobody at the helm, we can drift off course. That inner feeling pulling you to get back on course is only there for a brief time until you lose yourself back to the current forces pulling you along.

It’s this time we need to ride that wave of emotion and reach outside ourselves, break out of our routine, and begin travelling to the place we know we need to be so that when we have that next event in our life we are not wondering where the past few months or years went, wishing the time we spent was spent more wisely.

Did you ever have that empty feeling, wishing you did something you know you should have done? Maybe you read the obituary of a good friend who unexpectedly died, someone you have been thinking about contacting for months or years.

Why do we let time go without keeping those close to us close to us? Why do we let close relationships die? Does not our heart still care?

Life happens and we tend to listen less with our heart. We protect our emotions and guard ourselves. We get busy being busy.

Let’s challenge ourselves to live from our hearts…..call someone we haven’t talk to in a while but have been wondering how they have been doing. Tell our neighbors their yard looks good if we’ve been thinking it.

Live outside yourself today and you will not be worried you haven’t tomorrow.

NOTE: Picture of Sarah and Mom at Pete's house.

SARAH's VIDEO: Link under Links as well.
http://good-times.webshots.com/video/3002388750100508277LxncRw

Just Say It

2008-05-24T11:14:00.000-07:00

“The dew of compassion is a tear.”
Lord Byron (English Romantic poet and satirist, 1788-1824)

We all have those moments in our life, whether a certain scent, song, event, or visit back to somewhere you haven’t been in a while, that bring back memories; good, bad, and indifferent.

I had one of those moments a couple of weeks ago reading the Houston Chronicle. A father of three from El Salvador had killed his family and himself while in financial straits. The neighbor said he was a loving husband and father who apparently just lost it, not knowing what else to do. Out of a job with no money to feed the family and about to be evicted from the house he hand-built while living in a tent on the property.

What caught my attention was the day prior a neighbor who had helped the family with food in the past had asked the father if everything was okay and if he needed anything. The father said no, and they went about their way. The neighbor said he noticed something in his eyes that told me everything wasn’t okay.

That’s when it hit me. Back when I was stationed at Bitburg in 1985. It was Christmas time and I had stopped by the First Sergeant’s office around 1pm prior to my 3p –11p shift in the control tower. As I sat there talking to him I noticed he was pale. Maybe 50 years old, he didn’t look well and I thought I should ask him if he felt alright. I didn’t. We concluded our business and I went upon my way.

It was 9:30 pm that Friday night and all the air traffic was down. We were playing Uno, drinking black coffee, and then over the crash net radio we hear a need for an ambulance to respond to the bowling alley.
The lanes were about ¼ mile as the crow flies.

It wasn’t too much longer after that we found out that were responding to our First Sergeant. He had a heart attack and died while bowling with his wife and friends.

When I read that article on the father killing his wife and 7, 6, and 3-year old children I cried. I cried that someone could hurt so much to end their life. End the life of themselves and precious children they reported cherished. It also hurt to know and be reminded how sometimes we know in our heart and mind something is not right with someone, that maybe they need help, but we don’t ask.

Guarding compassion has it’s consequences. Let it come out.

A Two Pfennig Lesson

2008-04-20T06:20:00.001-07:00

A Two Pfennig Lesson

“If you judge people, you have no time to love them.”
Mother Teresa of Calcutta

When I was about 20 years old, while stationed at Bitburg Air Base in West Germany I would volunteer during to help with collections at our small chapel on base. One Sunday I was helping pass the basket around for collections and I experienced something in my life I'll never forget.

As I was making the slow walk from back to front dow the center aisle, sitting in the pew nearest the center was an elderly gentleman who was wearing a old heavy brown suit. He was probably in his 60’s and somewhat resembled Edward Teller, his bushy eyebrows standing out. He also stood out amongst the parishoner because rarely did we see anyone over 40, and having civilians on the base wasn’t too common unless they were locals who worked on the base or someone had family visiting from the US.

As the basket was making it way from the outside aisle toward me, the elderly man grabbed the basket with his left hand, took what was in his right hand, and dropped the coins on top of mostly dollar bills or enveloped. I judgingly observed what he slowly placed in the basket; two pfennigs.

Pfennigs were to marks, euro now, as pennies are to dollars. At the time you can get three marks to the dollar, so when you do the math two pfennigs is not very much. I was thinking was a cheap guy and it was a little silly to me.

After mass, our priest Father Brian, would have dinner at his house for the group who helped at service and others who wanted to join. I smartly remarked to the group about what I saw, making a joke of it.

Father Brian kindly informed me that the individual there was a guest of a family. He was from communist East Germany where they weren’t allow to go to church and what he was doing was basically against the law. Father Brian didn’t need to say much more, the guilt was running through me pretty strong.

Early in my life that was a pretty important lesson on not judging. Our tendencies to make judgements of others on such little information stems a lot from looking at the world through our eyes and mind and not our hearts.

Two pfennig or two hundred dollars, what did it matter anyway? Here was a guy in church, so proud to be there because he couldn’t at home, feeling good to be in public and pray. If I had that day back, I’d give that old man a hug before he left the church. I only ask for foregiveness for wickedly judging someone now.

Don't Worry, Be Happy

2008-04-13T07:12:00.001-07:00

"If I had my life to live over, I would perhaps have more actual troubles but I'd have fewer imaginary ones." ~Don Herold

Lately I have noticed the little things in life, and some of the big things, don’t worry me as much as when I was younger. Maybe it's because the younger you are, the more you feel you can control events. Also, the experience of a problem or predicament when younger seems huge because we have less to relate to; few experiences to fall back on. The youthful experiences of girlfriends dumping you, jobs not materialize like you want, or even young parents worried about their kids falling, failing or not being happy. Maturing helps us deal with issues; if we let it.

Now at 46, I find myself thinking past the problem or issue. I’ll do what I can do when I can do it, if I can do anything at all, and know that in one week, one month, or one year that most likely whatever it was that came up will pass, get resolved, or I’d overcome.

The only one issue that should all give us serious concern is health. The health of a loved one or our own. When health issues confront us on a serious nature, if we have already programmed ourselves to not let worry pull us down, we can confront health issues in a positive manner and get through them in many cases. Our positive attitude will also help others through their ordeal. Norman Cousins was a great example of how he managed through his illnesses with laughter as a medicine. Read up on him; a great story.

The stress related to worry is a killer. Minimize it in your life, and help others do the same. Think positively and confidently through life’s trials. Like I told Lori yesterday, ‘what doesn’t kill us makes us stronger.’ ‘The strongest wood comes from trees exposed to the wind.’

Outside of health, anything pressing you today? It will pass.

If I can help let me know.

Painting: I did that one a couple of years ago. Reminds me a little of when I lived in Germany. I lived in a farm house built in the 1600's which had it's own church.

My Daughter's Thoughts

2008-04-07T18:12:00.000-07:00

Sometimes life brings you pleasant surprises. Moments that hit you in the heart.

This morning, about 6am as I was getting ready for work, I went to get my laptop out of the theater room. On the table I saw some paper with a lot of handwriting. I read it. It was Sarah, writing some thoughts after she read my blog. The rest is hers.

_______________________________________________________________
Guardian Angels

We all want to say we have someone watching over us, protecting us. But do we believe it?

I think we will all discover we have one in our lives at some time or another. Whether you're sitting in church deciding God is yours or if you're like me reading a certain blog about a dear old friend. I think the reason we look for guardian angels is because we want to know we have someone on our side one-hundred percent of the time. In our minds we think this person will not judge us. They will give us the extra push and confidence we need because we think our angel is beside us to pick us up and brush the dirt off our knees when we fall.

When I was looking at the picture of Mr. Lema and myself, a wave of emotions came over me. Obviously I was very sad at first but then I began thinking about all the amazing times I had with him and will never forget. It would all start, a group of my cousins and I would venture next door to visit him. He would give us popsicles and slowly they would leave but I would always stay waiting for just one more story. He always had the coolest things to say. After everyone left he would pull out the donuts or muffins and tel me to 'keep it our little secret'. I wouldn't tell that secret to anyone in the world. When it was time to say good-bye it was just as hard to say good-bye to him as my grandparents. And I think at that young age I view him just as equally as I did my grandparents.

When I first learned he was sick I was devastated. I remember hearing it as I was sitting on my bed, just staring at the wall. I couldn't believe what I was hearing. More importantly, I didn't want to believe it. In my mind this man was invincible. All I wanted to do was run next door and take care of him. Unfortunately, I was in another state. Whem my parents told me he passed away I was almost in shock. It didn't seem real. He was the first person I ever really knew to die. For some reason I couldn't wrap my head around the fact that one day he was here and the next he wasn't. I wanted to believe he was in a better place, but to me the best place would be Burnside Avenue where I could always come visit. I can honestly say he was one of the greatest man I have ever known. I mean he must have been something special to make such a strong impact on me at such a young age. I wouldn't trade those memories for the world!

As I read the blog about how my Gramma saw an angel through Mr. Lemay, I had no doubt in my mind it was true. Mr. Lemay was one of the most good-hearted men there has probably ever been. I think that angel was a sign that everything was going to be okay for him and I believe it was.

It's been about 12 years and I can remember everthing about him. Even how his house smelled. Those are things I never want to forget. I can only hope my kids meet someone half the man he was.

MAKE A DIFFERENCE IN SOMEONE'S LIFE TODAY

2008-04-06T10:04:00.000-07:00

"The purpose of life is not to be happy - but to matter, to be productive, to be useful, to have it make some difference that you have lived at all." ~Leo Rosten

"Make a difference in someone's life today."

If you are around my house on a Saturday morning you will often hear me say that to Sarah, our high school senior, as she leaves the house at 8:30am on the way to gym to teach young girls gymnastics. As I said this yesterday our youngest Rebecca was listening and I turned the conversation to her and we discussed how "it's the little things we can do that can make a difference."

Now that Sarah drives herself to the gym, I miss those 20 minutes there and back having these discussions in more detail and in a captured setting. But I know the thought has sunken in as today, Sunday, she is leaving to go back to the gym, normally she has Sunday off, to run a birthday party for one of her students. Sarah asked me for a few bucks to buy the girl a birthday present saying "this little girl loves me."

How do we make a difference? We make a difference by caring and giving. We make a difference by consciously deciding to leave someone feeling better through our engagement than hoping to take something from it. It doesn't necessarily mean a tangible act, but could just be kind words of encouragement, hope, or love lifting someones feelings, thoughts, and emotions about themselves.

Whether it's with friends, coworkers, family, or strangers we meet at the store, coffee shop, track meet or wherever, what we do and say can "Make a Difference in Someone's Life Today."

PICTURE: Stan and Cynthia Myslenski canoeing down the Farmington River with their kids and grandkids making a difference.

Angels Among Us

2008-03-30T07:30:00.001-07:00

Behold, I send an Angel before thee, to keep thee in the way, and to bring thee into the place which I have prepared. Exodus 23:20

A few years back while I was visiting my parents in Connecticut my mother and I were at her home alone. Where my father, Lori, and the kids were I can’t remember. But our conversation I will never forget.

“Dave, I need to tell you something I haven’t told anyone yet,” my mother started the conversation getting my attention. What she told me was this and I will put it in context to understand better.

Mr. Lemay was our longtime next door neighbor. His wife, who I called Mrs. Lemay, had died several years prior. He was a good man. A laypersron at the church. He and his wife would hire me to shovel their snow in the winter and they paid me generously. When Paul and I were young Mr. Lemay helped us build a go-cart.

Mr. Lemay had become very sick and at the end was at home being visited by nurses. My mother was working part-time in the mornings at a coffee shop and would wake up early.

One morning, about 4:00 am she said she went over to check-in on him to see how we was doing. As she walked into the house and toward the bedroom she could see him resting in bed but something was unusual. There had what appeared to my mother a white light, like a transparent illuminated fog around Mr. Lemay. My mother said as she approached and saw his face it was as if he was smiling and happy.

She did not disturb him. She just decided to let him rest peacefully and go to the coffee shop.

When she returned home that day she stopped by to see how Mr. Lemay was doing. She told him she had stopped by and he looked to be resting and she didn’t want to wake him from resting.

Mr. Lemay then asked my mother, “Did you see them? Did you see the angels?”

Was that fluorescent looking light hovering around Mr. Lemay angels? Is that why his face was apparently glowing in happiness in his sleeping state? Could this person have such a pure heart that the angels were comforting him during a time of physical pain and suffering?

Mr. Lemay was a good man and he took a special liking to my daughter Sarah, and she took one to him. When we heard word of Mr. Lemay dying we were all saddened and Sarah was very emotional. Something she doesn’t show much.

Mr. Lemay was a man who lived a simple life, and was simply a good man. We miss him and still love him.

NOTE: Picture or Sarah and Mr. Lemay

What Really Matters?

2008-02-17T07:22:00.000-08:00

“Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.”

Leo F. Buscaglia

My regular workout on the Stairmaster this morning seemed like the 30-minutes I set the timer for was going to last an eternity. Nothing good to watch on the several TV monitors the gym had suspended from the ceiling to keep my mind occupied I decided to cut the Stairmaster workout short and head over to the basketball court. At 5 a.m. and nobody else there, I thought I could get a good sweat going running back and forth doing lay-ups.

While dribbling up and down the court I found it harder to make a simple lay-up that I thought it would be. The more I loosened up the easier it got, but making those lay-ups required more concentration than I remember. As I made a few more baskets and the muscles loosened up I tried to put a few elusive moves on phantom opponents.

It took a few minutes but I finally realized I had a disconnect between my mind and body when I leaped up trying a double-clutch underhand shot to fake out that phantom defender and my feet hit the floor before I released the ball. The space I was able to create between the floor and my feet was not quite the same as 30 years ago. Discouraged – No. Motivated to keep working out and having fun – yes.

On my drive home I began to think about aging. The physical side of aging does have it’s disadvantages, no doubt. But as I reflect back over the years and look at the positive aspects of aging, and what it has done to me mentally, I feel enlightened.

I have arrived at a place in life where I am enjoying the moment more than at any other time. I am in less of a hurry and concentrate on the experiencing the fullness of the moment. I see my daughter Sarah chomping at the bit for June 6th and high school graduation and how anxious she is to have it arrive while I look back and realize I too let times go bye with a whiz not realizing to take a deep breath and really enjoy the moment.

Time has also brought more meaning to relationships with others. Having seen tragedy or illness take loved ones away has made me realize how precious life is and how little time we do have together. When I see someone who I have known in my past, who I haven’t seen in some time, I often look at that person with deeper concern, and regret. Regretting that some of these folks I haven’t give them enough of my time to get to know them better. In some cases, not even trying to get to know them.

Life is a ‘boiling down process”. In time, the things that don’t really mean much in life become less important and you begin to realize the “important stuff”. Some of us realize the “important stuff” and act upon that knowledge. Some of us don’t act, but think of acting.

Take a deep breath and enjoy it like a cold drink on a hot day. We take for granted too much until too late.

Sunrise

2008-01-06T09:13:00.000-08:00

“With each sunrise, we start anew”

New Years Eve morning I was up early and decided to take some pictures of the sunrise. This morning, looking at those pictures, I am stricken some by the parallel of a new a beginning of a New Year and beautiful sunrise.

Both can make you stop and think of a new beginning; of hope. New Year resolutions, looking back and committing to change, improve on ourselves, make new commitments. New Beginnings!

As the sun quickly gets higher in the sky and the year quickly begins to pass we lose the perspective, that awe inspiring moment when in our soul we feel encouragement and gratefulness to have seen another year come or just witnessed a beautiful sunrise. We slowly fall back into our own mental traps, and those set by others, and quickly lose our inner focus.

I challenge all of us to keep that feeling in our hearts all year long………each day is the beginning of the year. Every morning there is that beautiful sunrise…….picture it in your mind. Each day you look at your family and friends, look at them through your heart, with love.

The Sunrise

The morning was dark,
The air was cool,
The bay was still,
It took all my will.

I waited with patience,
As the sky was clear,
Alone on the bank,
Knowing whom to Thank.

The birds started to move,
A glow on the horizon appeared,
It wouldn’t be long,
They were singing a song.

It caught me by surprise,
It was all of a sudden,
I saw just a sliver,
It made me quiver.

In a few minutes,
There it was,
As if to say,
“Have a Great Day!”
Happy New Year all!! Hope you can catch a sunrise soon. Go to the beach, climb a mountain, or come visit me and we will go toghether!!

Dave

Purpose

2007-12-29T07:00:00.001-08:00

First say to yourself what you would be; and then do what you have to do.

Epictetus

If we look back at the past few minutes of our lives, or even the past several days, it doesn’t seem too significant. Time’s passage hits us a whole lot harder as we look back over the years and reflect on our lives. The impact we made on others and ourselves.

Not being there for a significant event, saying the wrong thing, not saying anything at all;
not lending someone a hand, breaking a promise, breaking a heart;
forgetting to send a card, not sending a card, not making that call;
Moving away, staying away, maybe sometimes just getting in the way;
Taking a wrong path, not finishing what you started, not even starting.

Regrets we all have a few I am sure, and the test of time helps raise ‘regrets’ ugly head. What I didn’t do yesterday or last week doesn’t seem too significant until I add all those days and weeks up and ask myself how could you let so much time go by and accomplish so much which is so meaningless.

Meaningless may seem like a strong word, but what one accomplishes with God’s given ability is truly the measurement.

A lot of reflection. A search for a better understanding. The path forward, the past I will create will be different than the past I have left behind. More purpose in what I do, what I say, and how I think. Seek others that need a lift and extend my hand. My mission….my purpose.

We don’t need to be slaves of the past—slaves to our habits, regrets, inhibitions, or prejudices. For whatever time left we have to make a difference upon one another, we have the key to break the chains, fulfil our purpose.

A Simple Act of Love

2007-09-08T08:29:00.000-07:00

"The most important thing in life is to learn how to give out love, and to let it come in." ---Fenderx Morrie Schwartz

A Simple Act of Love

Sometimes it takes the simplest things to help put your life in perspective.

A few weeks ago while on vacation in Connecticut visiting my family my sister gave me a small wrapped gift. I opened it and it was a framed picture. The picture was taken I’d guess in 1968 or so on Wainwright Drive in New Britain, Ct during one of our visits to our grandparents.

Beth in the center, with my brother Paul and I sitting on the top of a Buick with bags of candy in our hands. So simple, the three of us together.

When she gave it to me tears swelled up in my eyes. A small gift, my sister saying I love you Dave, you’re still important to me. Guilt and remorse overcame me as I felt the distance I had allowed to build up in our relationship.

It made me think how over the past decades life has hardened me some, as it does others. Disappointments, rejection, mistakes, failures, and problems of the day. Worried more about tomorrow than enjoying the moment. Taking for granted what a great family I have and not communicating more regularly and sharing the love I have for them. Not happy enough with the success I have achieved.

One picture led me to go through all those I had at home when I got back to Texas. Seventeen years since Sarah was born and thirteen since Rebecca came into our lives. Where has the time gone, what did I miss?

The blur of my life is getting in focus, like a movie on fast forward starting to slow down enough where you can make sense of the story. The funny thing is I didn’t realize I was living a blur.

There is a lot more left ahead, in my life and yours, so why not take it in the slowest speed we can to enjoy the most out of it.

Changing perspective momentarily is easy, living it more difficult. I’ll keep looking at that picture to help me with those priorities.

Thanks Beth. I Love You.

Dave

NOTE: Lori read the blog and she shared with me this song I never heard of before which is very pertinent to this entry.... http://youtube.com/watch?v=p4ySSg4QG8g

The Test of Three

2007-08-04T06:50:00.001-07:00

The Test of Three

Keep this philosophy in mind the next time you hear or are about to repeat a
rumor.

In ancient Greece (469 - 399 BC), Socrates was widely lauded for his wisdom.

One day the great philosopher came upon an acquaintance, who ran up to him
excitedly and said,

"Socrates, do you know what I just heard about one of your students...?"

"Wait a moment," Socrates replied. "Before you tell me, I'd like you to pass a
little test. It's called the Test of Three."

"Test of Three?"

"That's correct," Socrates continued.

"Before you talk to me about my student let's take a moment to test what you're
going to say. The first test is Truth. Have you made absolutely sure that what
you are about to tell me is true?"

"No," the man replied, "actually I just heard about it."

"All right," said Socrates. "So you don't really know if it's true or not.

Now let's try the second test, the test of Goodness. Is what you are about to
tell me about my student something good?"

"No, on the contrary.."

"So," Socrates continued, "you want to tell me something bad about him even
though you're not certain it's true?"

The man shrugged, a little embarrassed.

Socrates continued, "You may still pass though because there is a third test -
the filter of Usefulness.

Is what you want to tell me about my student going to be useful to me?"

"No, not really..."

"Well," concluded Socrates, "if what you want to tell me is neither True nor
Good nor even Useful, why tell it to me at all?"

The man was defeated and ashamed and said no more.

This is the reason Socrates was a great philosopher and held in such high
esteem.

NOTE: I haven't been able to confirm Socrates actually said or promoted "The Test of Three" but find it a good philosophy to live by.

Cold Butter

2007-07-15T07:55:00.000-07:00

“I don't have pet peeves, I have whole kennels of irritation”
--Whoopi Goldberg

Cold Butter

Making some toast this morning I had to take a stick of butter out of the refrigerator. As I tried to slide the butter knife into it, the butter somehow in its wisdom diverted the knife sideways allowing me to slam the knife into the butter dish.

Sometimes the simplest things in life can be frustrating….or maybe we just allow them to make it so.

How many times do we get aggravated over the simplest things? Events or issues fairly unimportant but we make them into critical situations. That stick of butter got me thinking. If someone were home this morning I would have griped. But it was just me. I couldn’t gripe to my self, so I thought about it.

It wasn’t going to melt fast enough, I was going to tear up the toast putting it on, it wasn’t going to be as easy as I wanted. Okay…..so what.

We sometimes work ourselves up over nothing, and obsess on minutia. These pet peeves as they are called, these minor annoyances, can instill extreme frustration. Typically each of us have several pet peeves that aggravate us more than the average person. These frustrations can sometimes affect our state of mind, relationships, and mental health if not controlled. Why let cold butter ruin the start of a beautiful day?

The cold butter was a little lesson I needed this morning. It’s me that needs to soften up some, not the butter. Deciphering what really is my bent way of looking at things, and let all the trivial annoyances not get to me anymore is something I need to work on. Maybe we can all look at those ‘pet peeves’ of ours and work on minimizing them and ‘lighten up’ our lives.

With all that said, don’t let me catch you parking in a handicap spot!

Fences

2007-03-19T18:05:00.000-07:00

“The grass is not, in fact, always greener on the other side of the fence. Fences have nothing to do with it. The grass is greenest where it is watered. When crossing over fences, carry water with you and tend the grass wherever you may be.”

Robert Fulghum (1937 - ), It Was on Fire When I Lay Down on It

FENCES

It was a scene from The Horse Whisperer with Robert Redford I was watching that made me think about fences.

Fences, we build them to keep things from getting out;
We build them to keep others from getting in.
We build them of wood, of steel, of stone;
We build them short, we build them high.

They tell us without words, ‘this is mine, that is yours.”
They shout KEEP OUT, DANGER, and GO AWAY.
The electric, barbed, and razor wire.

Some of them have numbers on them,
200 in Little League, 320 in High School, and the pro’s
go higher. Going for the fence can be fun.

We see fences ever day, some locked, some not.
It’s the fences we don’t see that have me thinking.

It’s the fences we build in our lives. Some of them we have
Taken years to construct. Other we have put up in a hurry.

Some we build we call stereotypes and prejudices, rationalizing
Excuses to keep people out.
Some we build to keep people in. Some of these are the people we
Love and are afraid to lose.

We build fences so people can’t see into the backyard of our lives, hiding
Our weaknesses and insecurities.
We sit on the fence because we are afraid to commit, unsure what way to go,
Maybe wanting to appease everyone.

Fences have their purposes, but sometime don’t allow
For the proper perspective.
The greater our perspective, the greater our wisdom.
Picket fences are okay!

"A Child's First Step"

2007-02-25T07:47:00.000-08:00

“Failure breeds Success”

A Child’s First Step: An Experience for Life

I traveled back from Aruba yesterday. Having a window seat towards the back of the American Airlines Boeing 757, I was seated near a woman, around sixty, as she sat near her husband. They were headed back to Winnipeg. When we landed in Miami, a young woman in front of us had a young baby clutched close to her body. The child, a girl, was smiling wildly away at the elderly gentleman from Winnipeg who was making grandfatherly expressions towards the baby girl.

The elderly woman then asked the young girl, early twenties, “How old is she?”

“Five months,” the mother responded in a French accent and a proud smile.

“Five months,” was all the elderly Winnipeg woman responded with, not knowing what else to say.

We then started to deplane and I started to think about “A Child’s First Step”.

Most of us have experienced the sight of a toddler learning to walk. The word toddler is derived from the word ‘totter’ meaning to tremble or rock as about to fall. Whether the child was a niece, nephew, child of a friend’s, stranger in the park, one of our own children or a grandchild, most of us have witnessed this event.

Typically, this learning experience is initiated by an adult who wants to teach the child to walk. The “teacher” picks the child up under the arms, tries to help the child balance him or herself on its feet, then walks a couple of steps away with wide open arms encouraging the child to take a few steps knowing the child will fall. The child rocks and ways and usually falls the first several times.

This process is repeated, sometimes for days, until the child is ‘ready’ and then begins to take his or her first few steps. This event is then usually celebrated with phone calls to friends and family and proudly told to neighbors and coworkers over coffee.

I can’t remember back to when I went through this process personally, as most of us can’t. But I believe as a child our psyche is programmed to try new things and the encouragement we get from that single event is a major boost to our self-confidence. Here was a time in our lives it was okay to fall down while learning something. It was okay to ‘fail’ at something and still get the encouragement and support of others. We were taught not to give up.

Somewhere down the line I believe we ‘teachers’ lose sight of that process. We don’t accept that learning process of others ‘toddling’ and maybe evening falling. We become less supportive and more cynical.

Life is a journey of learning. New decisions are made daily with sometimes little information to go by. Mistakes are made. As I look back at my life, and see the mistakes I have made, I am glad I’ve had family and friends to continually encourage me. And you know what, I probably will stumble here and there but I know how to get back up and keep moving on.

Let’s be there for one another and others to get the most out of our journey.

NOTE: Picture is of Rebecca and Sarah in 1995.

DO YOUR MATH and GET INTO THE ZONE

2007-02-18T08:55:00.000-08:00

"Striving for success without hard work is like trying to harvest where you haven't planted” - David Bly

DO YOUR MATH and GET INTO THE ZONE

Have you ever caught yourself driving a car, find yourself at a particular place and time and can’t recall the last several miles of your trip? Not really conscious of the act of driving? Maybe a little scared and thinking to yourself, “How did I not get in an accident?”

I was driving to my daughter’s basketball game yesterday and this particular thought, the thought of how we get in a zone and can wind up someplace down the road without really much conscious effort. And as I began formulating my thoughts around this I started to relate this driving experience to life.

Beginning with the end in mind, we take an action. Yesterday, I was headed to a local gym. Knew where I was going, knew how I was going to get there. Pretty easy. I jumped in the car, turned it on, headed out, and didn’t really need to think too much on anything else. I arrived on time and enjoyed the game.

As I was driving back home, my thoughts returned to the earlier thought I had on how our mind falls into this zone and we lose consciousness of an pretty dangerous act, driving, but can perform it very successfully. I then began to relate this experience to our life’s experience, our personal journey, and I have come up with this personal theory.

When we are driving, we really do have control of the situation but we are being led by our subconscious mind rather than our conscious. Our subconscious is allowing our conscious mind to think on other things, maybe more pressing issues we need to deal with internally. This is allowed because we know where we are going and how we are going to get there. We free up our conscious thought process needs.

Could our life’s experience be very much different?

My theory is if we have specific goals and aspirations in life, if we can truly crystallize those thoughts and begin with the end in mind, develop the plan to get there, take action, our subconscious will take over and we will just be along for the ride. One day in the future, we would look back, and say ‘wow!’

Let’s write a simple math formula:

SUCCESS = (GOAL + PLAN + ACTION) x EFFORT

Many of us struggle each day in the conscious because we are missing a component of the above formula; no clear goals, no plan, no action or no effort. Is it that simple? Well, let’s look at Tiger Woods. We would agree he is a success wouldn’t we? Is there a component missing above? Do you not think he has a plan; a practice schedule, a course management plan, etc? Review the most successful businesses, do they have goals set each year, plans, with compensation models designed to drive action and effort.

IS IT THAT DIFFICULT? OR DO WE JUST NOT HAVE THE DISCIPLINE TO FOLLOW THE FORMULA?

The by-product of not following the formula is a bunch of stress, anxiety, and frustration. There is enough of that already when we do have it all together. The trip to the game yesterday could have been more complicated if there was traffic, construction, an accident, etc. We will always be adjusting our plans, moving obstacles, dealing with unknowns.

If you want to change you life DO YOUR MATH and GET INTO THE ZONE!!

And I encourage each of you, whether you’re ‘in the zone’ or not, to help someone else get there.

NOTE: Picture of me in 1986 Bitburb AB, West Germany receiving award.

You Never Know

2007-02-11T07:52:00.000-08:00

"Don’t count every hour in the day, make every hour in the day count."

A day, a week, a month, a year, 5 years, twenty years, or more. Time. The clock is ticking. With yesterday’s passing I have one more day on this earth. How many more I have….nobody knows.

So, how do I live my life….I don’t know how much time I have left. I don’t know how much time people I love have left.

Lets look at it this way.

If I had ONE DAY left, I would spend as much time with my family as I could. I’d try to ensure my daughters understood the important things in life and stayed close to their mother. I’d let my close friends and family know I loved them, especially thanking my mother and father for everything.

If I had ONE WEEK left, I’d travel back home to Connecticut so I could spend the last week with all my family. Seeing them all and letting them know how much I loved them. Eating some of my favorite foods, visiting some places that rekindled fond memories of my childhood, and making sure things were lined out for the girls.

If I had ONE MONTH to ONE YEAR, I’d still have to work, but wouldn’t let work consume my life. I’d still work hard, give it my all, but wouldn’t take it home with me. I’d be on borrowed time, and when I was off work, I’d spend as much time with the girls as possible. I’d work in a couple of rounds at golf, and hopefully they would be with my father and brothers. I’d write more, and paint a couple of paintings.

If I had FIVE YEARS to live, I’d work hard to figure out how to free up more time from work to spend with my family and at the same time put them in a better financial position, so in five years, when Rebecca’s a junior in high school and Sarah is graduating from college, they are financially stable and Lori can have a comfortable life. In those five years, I’d travel back to Europe with the girls for a vacation.

If I live BEYOND FIVE YEARS, and if I live my life as if I had a day, week, month or five years left, it’s all ‘lagniappe’ as they would say in the bayous of Louisiana.

Life is not a race….it doesn’t have to be a ‘rat race’. My intention is to live life with ‘purpose’ and truly being thankful for another day, living a day at a time.

NOTE: Picture is Grandma Alma "Thelma" Theriault Dorsey, a truly loving person who has had a big impact on a bunch of us.

Lessons From a Four-Year-Old

2006-12-31T09:30:00.000-08:00

“You have powers you never dreamed of. You can do things you never thought you could do. there are no limitations in what you can do except the limitations of your own mind.” Darwin P. Kingsley

LESSONS FROM A FOUR-YEAR-OLD

She was four years old playing upstairs with our neighbors daughter in their third floor apartment. The phone rang and Lori answered it. Lori was quiet, listening, turning quickly, and looking at me with wide-open eyes that told me something was wrong. She hung up the phone, then bolted out our first floor apartment and headed upstairs.

“Sarah is hurt!” was all I heard.

I stayed behind with our newborn daughter Rebecca anxiously waiting for Lori to bring Sarah down. She came through the door with Sarah in her arms and a cloth on her forehead where she was bleeding. She fell and banged her head between the eyebrow and hairline on her forehead.

After fumbling through wallets and finding numbers to call our HMO to let them know we had to take our daughter into the emergency room, and a fight it was, we finally got loaded up and went to the Lower Bucks Hospital in Bristol, PA. The wait to see the doctor wasn’t as long of an experience an emergency room visit can be. But after the doctor saw her, he wanted to call in a plastic surgeon that would do a better job stitching her up. He didn’t want to leave a big scar, especially a young girl he said. So we waited for a plastic surgeon to be called in.

The three of us waited and talked. We left Rebecca with our neighbor. We were constantly assuring Sarah everything would be okay, and maybe reassuring ourselves. When the plastic surgeon arrived and it was time for Sarah to get stitched up, we were asked to remain outside and wait.

Impatiently and nervously waiting, I continued badgering Lori how something like this can happen. I worked in a chemical plant, and it was drilled in me accidents don’t happen. I looked to blame someone on how a four-year-old could fall off a plastic indoor slide and bang her head. My baby was hurt.

They finally walked out. The doctor said she’ll be fine and there will be little signs of a scar in the future. There were no tears in her eyes and she proudly boasted, “Daddy, I didn’t cry!”

I can’t remember how Lori or I responded, but I remember Sarah telling us “I thought happy thoughts!”

Today I think back today and can’t recall if we coached her to prepare for the stitches while in the waiting room, or it was something previously she had learned. What sticks out in my mind today is the power of that four-year-old’s mind to control her thoughts not to cry and think happy things to overcome a traumatic incident for a kid that age.

I was reminded of this incident a few weeks ago when I received a text message from now a 16-year-old who was in school not feeling well. She wanted to come home with a few classes left. I was trying to convince her to stay, and learn to ‘suck it up.” Then it came over me, and I texted, ‘Think happy thoughts.”

I received somewhat of a smart comment back, but the text messages stopped and she stayed the rest of the day.

Reflecting on this whole situation, I look at the innocence of a child and the strength of the mind to overcome adversity. A strong imagination which can convince the mind of most anything. As we get older, our ability to control our thoughts, and in essence affect our happiness in life, is diminished.

For whatever reason, whether it is the hard knocks of reality that hits us, negative influence from others, whatever reason, we don’t use our minds to our advantage. We let life condition our mind to our disadvantage. We know all the reasons why we can’t do something. We become risk adverse.

Everyone has heard the expression; “TRUE HAPPINESS LIES WITHIN EACH ONE OF US.” Take control of your thoughts and you take control of your life. Is it easy? Nope. Just like losing weight, you have to work on it every day.

……and maybe start thinking like a four-year-old again.

$65 a Month

2006-11-19T04:56:00.000-08:00

$65 a Month

“May your charity increase as much as your wealth”
-Proverbs

$65 a month. To many of us, $65 a month may not seem like much. Many of us have a decent amount of disposable income where we are not pinched for basic necessities or maybe some extra’s that make the difference to barely making it to enjoying life a little.

On a recent trip I read “From Worst to First” by Gordon Bethune. (Steve, I still have your book.) I’ll tell you right now, this is one that makes it to the list as one of the best and in my blog you’ll find a link. “From Worst to First” is about how Bethune transformed Continental Airlines in mid-1990’s from an airline on the brink of it’s third bankruptcy to a point just a couple of years later they were extremely profitable and their stock went from the mid $3 range into the $50.

A great story on managing, leading, motivating, communicating, sharing, recognizing, and winning. Very much worth a read.

So, where does the $65 a day play into this?

Early into his job as CEO, Bethune realized he needed to get the Continental Team (40,000 of them) focused on improving what was important to the “person in the 5th seat”; the passenger. They needed to get their customers back and grow their business. One of the strategies he employed was to tie in the On-Time Arrival and Departure measure reported by the Department of Transportation into a monthly incentive for his employees. So, he set out the goal if the Company measured in the top 5 of the major 10 airlines, the employees would be paid a $65 monthly bonus.

This helped Continental in a few ways. 1) With more on-time service, customers would be more apt to continue to use Continental, 2) Employee morale would improve if they saw their actions which helped drive improvement was rewarded, 3) Even though the bonuses when paid out would cost $2.5 million per month, by getting in the top 5 the company would save $5 million per month in bus tickets, hotel rooms, sending customers on other flights, etc. It was a win-win.

Well, once the Team hit their goal, the checks were sent out. And as you read some of the responses Bethune got back from his employees, it would bring tears to your eyes. People wrote and thanked him because the extra $65 they got that month they were able to use the money for things they couldn’t afford before. Things most of us would take for granted. Some basic stuff.

And as I read this, I thought how fortunate was I. $65 a Month. I began questioning myself, ‘What can I do to have that impact on someone’s life? And with the Holiday season approaching, how many people and families can I help?’

Little things mean a lot, and it’s not all about money. The extra clothes we have in our closets we haven’t worn in years. The books we have on the shelves which will never be opened again. Closets, garages, attics, cellars, full of stuff we will never use. (Last year I donated my King Cobra’s to the golf course and asked them to find a child whose parents couldn’t afford them. I received the warmest letter back from a young man thanking me. I need to do more of that.)

Let’s all make sure we think about those who need a hand up, who need a hug, a pleasant hello, a smile. Let’s extend ourselves beyond our family to those who may be away from theirs. Let’s encourage giving. Giving love, time, aid, and whatever someone else will value, and appreciate.

We can’t do too much. Time is short.

Remember, our death will be eulogized over what we gave and left behind, not what we consumed. Not many funerals do you hear people talk about how good someone was to themselves, but to others.

And when you see others doing for others, thank them today and encourage them for many of them fight the same battles themselves and need our compassion.

NOTE: If interested in a superb book, I recommend reading "From Worst to First". I provided a link on the right column to make your purchase easy. That book and "Nuts" are two of the better business books I've read.

Painting

2006-10-29T09:22:00.000-08:00

“Every artist dips his brush in his own soul, and paints his own nature into his pictures." - Henry Ward Beecher

PAINTING

In was around 1986 while stationed at Eglin AFB, Florida I was living in Colony House Apartments in Fort Walton Beach. Working a schedule of two day shifts, two night shifts, then two days off, I found I had quite a bit of extra time. During that period I was able to complete a master’s degree, but the work and school schedule still left me with some extra time. Golf kept me occupied some of the time as well as the night life around the Ft. Walton Beach / Destin hotspots.

Through one of the windows of the first floor apartments I would see an elderly woman painting. She would paint near her window, working in the natural light. I never did paint, but had some interest in learning. One day, out of the blue, I decide to knock on her door and ask her where I would be able to learn. That was the beginning of a special relationship.

Mary Belser was in her early seventies at the time. Probably around 5’4”, silver hair, wore glasses, and a grandmotherly figure. She was a true southern belle, a devout Christian who I attended service with at times, and a fabulous artist. Her small one bedroom apartment had the walls covered with beautiful paintings.

She had a painting class with about 5 women on Wednesday’s and offered to teach me as well; $8 an hour. We fit in the painting lessons to work with my schedule. Once a week I would go over, we’d talk, and she’d teach me to paint.

After a short period of time, it wasn’t about the painting anymore, it was the company. She was single, widowed, alone much of the time and I was single, away from my family, missing the visits with my grandmother I would regularly make.

I learned a lot from Mary. I learned to look at life and pay attention to the details. I learned to look at a tree, and not only see the tree, but the different shades in the tree. I learned how light will change the appearance of something, and how perspective can change. I learned relationships don’t need boundaries between young and old. I learned to listen to someone tell me about their life and how sometimes just being there to listen can make a difference.

I learned that there are good people out there who can make a difference in our lives if we just knock on their door.

I moved. Mary died not too long after. My heart was saddened.

Her painting lives on through me.

In life, we make good friends and develop special relationships. Life happens, people go separate ways, take different paths…..sometimes never reconnecting, but the memories and difference they have made are visible in our paintings.

My canvas is still wet; more to create. But the painting I create next is not nearly important as the paintings I help someone else create.

(NOTE: “THE EAGLE” by David)

Carrot, Egg and Coffee

2006-10-14T07:40:00.000-07:00

Carrot, Egg and Coffee...You will never look at a cup of coffee the
same way again...

A young woman went to her mother and told her about her life and how things were so hard for her. She did not know how she was going to make it and wanted to give up. She was tired of fighting and struggling. It seemed as one problem was solved, a new one arose.

Her mother took her to the kitchen. She filled three pots with water and placed each on a high fire. Soon the pots came to boil. In the first she placed carrots, in the second she placed eggs, and in the last she placed ground coffee beans. She let them sit and boil, without saying a word.

In about twenty minutes she turned off the burners. She fished the carrots out and placed them in a bowl. She pulled the eggs out and placed them in a bowl. Then she ladled the coffee out and placed it in a bowl.

Turning to her daughter, she asked, "Tell me what you see."

"Carrots, eggs, and coffee," she replied.

Her mother brought her closer and asked her to feel the carrots. She did and noted that they were soft. The mother then asked the daughter to take an egg and break it. After pulling off the shell, she observed the hard boiled egg. Finally, the mother asked the daughter to sip the coffee. The daughter smiled as she tasted its rich aroma.

The daughter then asked, "What does it mean, mother?"

Her mother explained that each of these objects had faced the same adversity - boiling water. Each reacted differently.

The carrot went in strong, hard, and unrelenting. However, after being subjected to the boiling water, it softened and became weak.

The egg had been fragile. Its thin outer shell had protected its
liquid interior, but after sitting through the boiling water, its inside became hardened.

The ground coffee beans were unique, however. After they were in the boiling water, they had changed the water.

"Which are you?" she asked her daughter. "When adversity knocks on your door, how do you respond? Are you a carrot, an egg or a coffee bean?"

Think of this: Which am I? Am I the carrot that seems strong, but with pain and adversity do I wilt and become soft and lose my strength?

Am I the egg that starts with a malleable heart, but changes with the heat? Did I have a fluid spirit, but after a death, a breakup, a financial hardship or some other trial, have I become hardened and stiff? Does my shell look the same, but on the inside am I bitter and tough with a stiff spirit and hardened heart?

Or am I like the coffee bean? The bean actually changes the hot water, the very circumstance that brings the pain. When the water gets hot, it releases the fragrance and flavor. If you are like the bean, when things are at their worst, you get better and change the situation around you.

When the hour is the darkest and trials are their greatest, do you elevate yourself to another level? How do you handle adversity? Are you a carrot, an egg or a coffee bean?

May you have enough happiness to make you sweet, enough trials to make you strong, enough sorrow to keep you human and enough hope to make you happy.

The happiest of people don't necessarily have the best of everything; they just make the most of everything that comes along their way. The brightest future will always be based on a forgotten past; you can't go forward in life until you let go of your past failures and heart aches. When you were born, you were crying and everyone around you was smiling. Live your life so at the end, you're the one who is smiling and everyone around you is crying.

(I don't know who originally wrote this, I would give them the credit. My sister Penny emailed this to me. Thanks Penny!!)

KINDNESS

2006-09-23T18:46:00.000-07:00

KINDNESS

When I was young, I used to admire intelligent people; as I grow older, I admire kind people. – Abraham Joshua Heschel

The quotation as the lead in was one of the Quotes of the Day I had sent out last week. The reason I had picked that particular quote is, ‘it kind of hit me.’ As part of re-inventing myself, I have been working on my version of Random Acts of Kindness, helping others, being a kinder person. On my goals card, I have written what I’d like to be 5-years from now that I’m not right now…two of my five answers are more loving and more giving.

Last Thursday I was having dinner with a friend of mine in a fairly nice restaurant. There were not many people in there, and a group of four was seated near our table. A gentleman, I’d guess in his fifties was seated where he was facing me. As the waitress approached his table and greeted them, he smiled and greeted her back with an extremely engaging smile and pleasant hello and asked a couple of questions. He did this in such a “deep-down nice” manner I immediately thought about the quote I had sent out earlier in the week.

A year ago, two years ago…..I probably would have never noticed. Today I do.

Turning 44 last week I see myself in the middle of a journey. The middle of my growth, hopefully understanding and knowing only half of what I know today.

As each day goes by, my intention is to be a little more loving, a little more giving, a little nicer and a little wiser.

In doing this, I intent to isolate each moment and enjoy it. And though this process I will explain my revelations to my children, so they may realize these learnings earlier in their life. But like the quote I sent Friday, “Nothing that is worth knowing can be taught” I realize my girls will have to experience some things…and struggle through some….before they really ever understand.

Through this “isolation of moments” I will accomplish a few things. I will feel less rushed…more relaxed. I will be more productive….with a clear focus and concentration. I will be more engaged and open to those around me….giving them my attention. And in ‘being in the moment’ I will be more receptive to others.

And to sum it up with a quote, I’ll use this one……

“I expect to pass through this world but once; any good thing therefore that I can do, or any kindness that I can show to any fellow creature, let me do it now; let me not defer or neglect it, for I shall not pass this way again.”
Stephan Grellet

INSTRUCTIONS FOR LIFE

2006-09-17T16:49:00.000-07:00

INSTRUCTIONS FOR LIFE

from "Life's Little Instruction Book", by Jackson Brown and H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

(NOTE: This is a picture I took not too far from our house here in Seabrook. Galveston Bay)

Take into account that great love and great achievements involve great risk.

When you lose, don't lose the lesson.

Follow the three Rs:

Respect for self

Respect for others and

Responsibility for all your actions.

Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck.

Learn the rules so you know how to break them properly.

Don't let a little dispute injure a great friendship.

When you realize you've made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.

Spend some time alone every day.

Open your arms to change, but don't let go of your values.

Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.

Live a good, honorable life. Then when you get older and think back, you'll be able to enjoy it a second time.

In disagreements with loved ones, deal only with the current situation. Don't bring up the past.

Share your knowledge. It's a way to achieve immortality.

Be gentle with the earth.

Once a year, go someplace you've never been before.

Remember that the best relationship is one in which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other.

Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it.

Approach love and cooking with reckless abandon.

-------------------------------------------

Thank you Jerry for sharing that with me.

The Circus Elephant Syndrome

2006-09-09T18:00:00.000-07:00

THE CIRCUS ELEPHANT SYNDROME

Many years ago I read a book, and since then I have seen it in other books as well, the story of how they train circus elephants. When they are very young, the elephant trainers take a very strong chain and clasp with a very heavy stake. They drive the stake deep in the ground and attach the clamp and chain to the baby elephants. The small undeveloped elephants are not yet strong enough to break the chain. But they try to walk away and can’t. They try and can’t, and can’t, and can’t. Then one day, they stop trying.

The trainers then know when the elephant is conditioned and they no longer need the chains. What we see at the circus is a well trained elephant, but what we really don’t understand is we see an elephant who lives in a world of false limitations.

We humans, God’s greatest creatures, are no different when it comes to living within false limitations. Limitations in our mind.

Many people in life are not happy. They are not happy because there are certain things just not right. It may be financial, spiritual, physical, educational, relationship, or familial issue. Which of these issues can usually be made right overnight?

So what do people do? Usually complain. Complain about the weather, their boss, the kid’s teacher, and it’s just in their genes. They find fault in others. They gossip, whisper, and find allies who agree with them. Spending their energy in negative thinking, and going nowhere. Like the circus elephant, they are stuck, with no clue what is holding them back. Not realizing their chain…….is their mind….the way they think about things.

Then sometimes something comes along that shatters their thought process, maybe scares them to death. A check-up at the doctor that doesn’t go well. The loss of a job. The loss of a loved one. Events, that make a change in the thinking pattern. You seen this in the circus as well. The elephant that runs loose, the tigers that attack their handler. Out of the blue these animals react, usually on an event, something different. A camera flash, loud noise, whatever.

Why do we need “EVENTS” to move us into a mode of thinking that will cause us to take action toward something we wanted in the first place? Think about it. How many people have you seen change their life around based upon a negative event?

So, how do we create the same call to action in our lives? Action that will move us in a direction and to a place we would rather be anyway.

The answer lies in the strength of a VISION. Can you clearly see in your mind, and feel what it will feel like to live in a place you want to go. Let me explain it like this for you dreamers. When you dream at night, and are awakened by a frightful dream, do you wake up scared? Have you ever had a sexual dream and had felt the same effect as if you were actually experiencing it?

It’s all in your mind. Your subconscious mind doesn’t know if an event is real or not.

Now, if you can see where you want to go in life, and develop a strong VISION where you can arouse your senses, you can create positive EVENTS, although in your mind, that will excite you toward action. Have you heard or read the Proverb, “as a man thinketh in his heart, so is he.” We become what we think about.
The elephant stay put because he thinks he can get away.

Are you conditioned, with artificial limitations, like the circus elephant?

PASSION

2006-09-02T07:04:00.000-07:00

Wisdom is not a product of schooling but of the lifelong attempt to acquire it.

– Albert Einstein, physicist

PASSION

Passion. I use that word often when I am describing to our corporate executives the type of emotion we need to foster in our business. Great businesses are built on passion. The best example I can use is Southwest Airlines, and for those who fly them often you know what I mean. They are a company built on passion. Once a small company, that was built on passion, it is now a big company thinking small with a lot of passion. If you are in business, a must read is the book NUTS about Southwest and why they are so successful. Also, quarter after quarter after quarter Southwest makes money. No government subsidies, no bankruptcies, just a good business model and passionate people. Can you tell I am a raving fan of Southwest…….think it might be because of their passion??

Passion…..how passionate are you? How passionate are you about anything? Let’s look back in our lives, and find times we felt what it was like to be passionate. The easiest one I can think of is at the beginning of a new relationship. Whether it was your first serious girlfriend or boyfriend, fiancée, or spouse. Think back to the first few days, weeks, months….the peak of the courtship. Constantly thinking about that person, waiting for the phone to ring, not wanting the night to end. Passionate to the point of obsession.

I hope you can rekindle those feelings in your mind……do you feel it?

What are we passionate about today? Most people aren’t passionate about anything. Why….no goals, no dreams, not much love for any one particular thing. In a beginning of a relationship, we are pretty passionate to establish that relationship for a couple of reasons. We probably believe we love that person, and then the sex thing. We get real passionate.

I know people who are extremely passionate about sailing…why, it’s what they love to do. They DREAM all day of sailing, and when they get the time they go. They dream of sailing different boats, they dream of sailing around the world and pulling into exotic ports.

I listened to a woman talk yesterday. Her passion was to get her husband over here from India. She has been here in the US for two years working, saving enough money to get her husband here (legally). She has a goal, a dream. Two Years!!! Listening to the tone of her voice, the cracking, trying to hold the tears back….passion….dreams…..what’s ahead in her life….her passion drives her to make work endless hours to get her husband here. Amazing lady.

Sometimes our passion results from deep values we have. People are passionate about their religion. It’s a love for their God. You may know some people passionate about their health. Disciplined to go to the gym, eat healthy, do the right things. Passionate about looking good, feeling good. And when it comes to religion and health, sometimes the passion is instigated by other events. Failing health, death of a loved one, or realization of our own mortality. You hear people say “he found God” or “she was born again” or “he is a health freak now”. What those people don’t understand is the people they are talking about have found a passion for something bigger….a passion for an ultimate goal. And it’s difficult to understand from the outside looking in…..

……and some of us find our passion only after we have escaped the shackles which have kept us down.

Passion is like a drug. It keeps you up late at night, gets you up earlier, makes you feel better, puts rose colored glasses in front of your eyes, and a smile on your face. It is addictive.

Do you want passion in your life?

Do you have any dreams? Big goals?

Sit down….write down what you want….I have an index card I carry around with me with three questions complete. Here they are:

#1) 5 years from now…..I would like to be that I am not right now…..
#2) 5 years from now…..I would like to do that I am not doing now…..
#3) 5 years from now….I would like to have I don’t have right now….

My answers are not personal, but if you are interested, ask me. I will let you know.

Those answers give me the passion to do what I am doing today. My dreams, and reaching my dreams are my passion. Reread my challenge. I’ve made some modifications to the original, but I am still moving forward.

Do you need some help finding your passion?……call me…..let’s talk through it……..

Live Your Life with PASSION!!!!

Dave

PS….I was also introduced to a 62 year old woman who decided to enroll in the University of Hawaii to get her degree. It was going to take 3 years to complete. One of her friends said to her she was crazy, she would be 65 in three years. The woman smartly replied, “I am going to be 65 anyway, why not with a degree.” You’re never too old to find your passion.

ANTICIPATION

2006-08-26T09:33:00.000-07:00

Anticipation

Yesterday morning as I was preparing for another great day, I was overcome with a thought I have not been able to get out of my mind since. Anticipation. Here’s the definition:

Main Entry: an·tic·i·pa·tion
Pronunciation: (")an-"ti-s&-'pA-sh&n
Function: noun
1 a : a prior action that takes into account or forestalls a later action b : the act of looking forward; especially : pleasurable expectation2 : the use of money before it is available
3 a : visualization of a future event or state b : an object or form that anticipates a later type
4 : the early sounding of one or more tones of a succeeding chord to form a temporary dissonance -- compare SUSPENSION
synonym see PROSPECT

The emotion related to anticipation can be very euphoric. I started to think back in my life when I had anticipated an event that had me in a state of mind which was nearly ecstatic. We’ve all had them. Some of my memories,

The Night Before…….

….going to Fenway Park with my family to watch a baseball game
….going fishing opening day at the Salmon River with my Uncle Pat and Brother Paul
….a big game I had to pitch
….my first date
….graduation
….flying back from Germany to see my family
….the night before a big golf tournament

Anticipating the birth of my children, their first tooth, their first step, their first word, their first day of school, their first date (maybe I dread that), their graduation, their wedding, their kids.

If we can only harness the positive emotion of anticipation.

Can we condition ourselves, do the positive things we need to do, to feel this way on a daily basis? Can we ANTICIPATE each and every day as we have others? If we can, and I know we can, we find a renewed energy for life, a renewed energy for each other, and there becomes a clearer direction. Have you ever seen or talked with anyone that has had a near death experience? Have you ever met anyone who had been treated for cancer, thought they were going to die, and then becomes healthy again?

Why does it take events like that to change people? Why should a doctor tell us shape up or you’ll be shipping yourself out?

Setting goals / defining things we want to accomplish in life helps move us toward an “anticipation state” versus the opposite: dread. How much do we dread events, or even non-events? Dread sucks the life out of us. It’s only one letter different than dead.

Many times, where we want to go or what we want to accomplish has two diametric choices. Example, you want to lose weight. You can think about it and anticipate the day when you have accomplished your goal, and reach you target. You look good, clothes fit different, have more energy, and are proud of the accomplishment. Anticipation of the end result can absolutely fire you up to take action to get it done.

Or you can take the other side of the coin. You dread having to change your habits. You dread exercising. You dread eating healthy. So you do nothing.

Anticipation…….what are you anticipating?

I thought I ‘d check Carly Simon’s Anticipation lyrics. We all know the song from the Heinz ketchup commercial. I’ve included them below.

Life is Great! Life is Great! Life is Great!

I anticipate seeing you all very soon! And if I can ever do anything for anyone, please let me know. And if you can touch someone else’s life and help them where they want to go, please extend a helping hand.

Dave

Artist: Carly Simon
Song: Anticipation

We can never know about the days to come
But we think about them anyway
And I wonder if I'm really with you now
Or just chasing after some finer day.

Anticipation, Anticipation
Is making me late
Is keeping me waiting

And I tell you how easy it is to be with you
And how right your arms feel around me.
Bit I rehearsed those words just late last night
When I was thinking about how right tonight might be.

Anticipation, Anticipation
Is making me late
Is keeping me waiting

And tomorrow we might not be together
I'm no prophet, I don't know natures way
So I'll try to see into your eyes right now
And stay right here, 'cause these are the good old days.

The Million Dollar Man

2006-08-22T19:53:00.000-07:00

The Million Dollar Man

Well, I told you I’d write about a friend of mine who made a million in four years. Here is the story.

Back in 1997 when I was working at Rohm and Haas I met a fellow, I’ll call Marco. Marco worked for HydroChem and I met him at lunch as he and a couple of others were talking to me about how HydroChem could help reduce our plants industrial cleaning costs.

Fast Forward to July 2001. That lunch in 1997 was the only time I met Marco until July 2001. I had recently left Rohm and Haas to work with HydroChem. I went up to New Jersey to participate with HydroChem and their customers in a regional customer golf outing. Who do I see there? You guessed it, Marco.

“Hey Dave, remember me?” he asked, genuinely glad to see me again.

Vaguely I recalled that meeting 4 years earlier.

Over the next few months we began to work closer together and develop a friendship. In 2002 Marco read a book on options and told me I should read it. I said, “Send it to me!” I never got it. I spoke with him again, he told me about. I said, “Copy it and send it!” I never got it. He already loaned it out. Over the next couple of years he told me he was doing pretty good………never HOW GOOD.

Now it is 2006. He is back here with HydroChem in the Houston area. He is down visiting me in Freeport. I am telling him some of my dreams for the next few years, things I want to accomplish (The Challenge) and like a friend, he listens and encourages me.

He then tells me he needs to get me involved in the option system he is using. He said it was working well for him. He then tells me how well.

He says Dave, “I moved up to Delaware with $30,000 in my 401K and enough for a down payment on a house. Last year I went over $1,000,000.” I started thinking about that darn book.

I said “Marco’” with the excitement of a kid in a candy store, “we need to have dinner this week and you need to explain it to me.”

Two nights later we had dinner together and he went through the process. Here were his returns on his investment. In 2002 he made 52% on his money, 2003 56%, 2004 74%, and 2005 91%. Needless to say I got pretty excited. Right now he is making about $20K - $25K return. In 48 months he had three months where he had a negative %.

Well, I’m in. I’ll keep you posted.

NEWS

Sarah turns 16 tomorrow, the 23rd. Everything is going well. I look forward to hearing from you.

Dave

Poems by Sarah

2006-08-20T17:01:00.000-07:00

Golf and Football

Golf
Calm, slow
Relaxing, calming, hitting
Masters, Woods, Superbowl, Patriots
Tiring, exhausting, throwing
Crazy, fast
Football

Gymnastics

Gymnastics
Competitive, fast
Twisting, flipping, jumping
Shows all my talent
Twisting top

The Golf Ball

The golf ball flew through the air.
It smiled with dimples,
Pleased Tiger Woods hit it so well.
The golf ball felt like a proud father.
The golf cart was given
A quick jolt of life
As Tiger pressed the pedal
So he could go retrieve the ball.
The ball lay gracefully,
Awaiting another hit
Right on the sweet spot.
The ball rolled on the green.
It looked as if it were a person on fire
Doing the stop drop and roll routine.

It’s not my fault
It’s not my fault
I was late to class.

It’s not my fault
I was walking down the hallway
And a teacher I should not name
Walked down the same hall and I had NO room to get by.

It’s not my fault
My teacher held me back to tell me her life story
Because we loved to drink the same type of soda.

It’s not my fault
Someone started throwing up and
We all had to be disinfected by Poison Control.

I’ll… go get a pass.

86,400

2006-08-12T11:22:00.000-07:00

86,400

The number of seconds in a day: eighty-six thousand four hundred. It seems like a lot doesn’t it, but oh how does it fly. As each second ticks bye it’s gone forever. Those seconds have become minutes, hours, days, months, years, and in my life decades. WOW!

How much do we value these seconds? Interesting question, so let me put it this way. On a piece of paper, or in your mind I want you to come up with a date. The date I want you to come up with is the day you think you will die.

Okay, now you are thinking ‘man is David going nuts’! What a stupid question! It can’t be answered. The sad part about it is we don’t know if we will die today, tomorrow, a month from now, or years from now. We live life like we have all the time in the world and in reality we may have a fraction left. We just don’t know.

We all have had family or friends killed in freak accidents or die soon after cancer diagnosis and most all of us don’t value time like we should.

I asked myself, Dave, if you had one day left to live, what would that day be like. Money no object. So, I could go see the Egyptian Pyramids (one of my dreams), or do whatever I want. My perfect day would be getting my father, brother, uncles, brother-in-laws, cousins, and friends who golfed in an early morning golf outing then all go to one of my sisters houses for a big old fashioned family bar-b-que where we are all spending time together, playing wiffle ball, cards, horseshoes, eating, etc. At the end of the day we would have a bunch of fireworks and watch the kid’s roast marshmallows. Pretty simple isn’t it.

I read where the average father spends 7-minutes in one-on-one conversation with their children per week. This hit me at the core. Because I knew I haven’t been spending enough time myself. If I am not conversing with my kids, I am not teaching. So, I’ve picked it up a few notches there.

Have I squandered a bunch of time in my life? You bet. Have I learned a lot of lessons in life? Yep. Am I going to take the lessons I learned, employ them in my own life and share with others, including my children. Absolutely!

We all have powerful stories to tell lessons learned to be shared and limited time ahead of us. Let’s make most of our time left together in sharing, achieving, praising, encouraging, laughing, and loving.

DON’T LET ANYTHING, A-N-Y-T-H-I-N-G, hold you back from your goals and dreams. Yesterday is gone!!! Get pumped up you’re alive!!

Next time I’ll tell the story how a good friend of mine here made $1,000,000 in four-years.

TRAVEL PLANS

Looks like I will head up to Baltimore the weekend before Thanksgiving, spend some time at Paul’s then head up to Connecticut with him. I am hoping to see my good friends in New Hampshire, Rick, Mike and Carol (if they’re available) around Thanksgiving.
p.s. My door is still open. COME VISIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It is nice and HOT down here!!!!!

Picture: Rebecca on 8/12/06. She’ll be turning 12 on September 2nd. Sarah’s coming up on the 23rd of this month (Sweet 16)

DOORS OF LIFE

2006-08-05T16:10:00.000-07:00

DOORS OF LIFE

Doors I’ve opened,
Doors I’ve closed.
Looking back,
Life presents a lot of doors.
Some have been opened for me,
Some I have opened for myself,
Some I opened for others.
Some I have never opened,
Some I have closed,
Some I still have opened.
Doors of Sadness,
Doors of Happiness,
Doors of Pain,
Doors of Pleasure,
Doors that have Blinded me,
Doors that have Enlightened me,
Doors of hate,
Doors of Love,
Doors of Selfishness,
Doors of Charity.
Knowing I can open a door
With a simple act
Fearful of the consequences
Hopeful of the outcome
Hoping it doesn’t lock behind me
Hoping I can stay in there forever
Keeps me mindful of which doors I open.
Age and reasoning can bring awareness,
Then maybe discipline.
First to know we opens doors,
Then a wisdom to see behind them,
Then the strength to walk past those
That lead us to places we no longer can see,
That lock behind us, and bring us misery.
The doors of my future, fewer will I open.
Some I am closing today,
And some I am going back to.
Opening and closing.
More respectful of the Doors of Life.

2006-07-29T10:22:00.000-07:00

INNER PEACE

For most of us, inner peace is something we all desire. It's getting to that place where our minds are quiet. As I continue on my Challenge, which now I have come to realize it is my path to inner piece, I have come across an interesting perspective on the 'secret to achieving inner peace'.

In Hyrum W. Smith's book The 10 Natural Laws of Successful Time and Life Management he writes, "The secret to achieving inner peace lies in understanding our inner core values - those things in our lives that our most important to us - and then seeing that they are reflected in the daily events of our lives." He continues, "In other words, doing a better job at managing our time is meaningless ulness we are managing it to accomplish those things that are of greatest importance in our lives."

As I read this about midnight last night, I began to simply reflect on this quote. Since I have been doing some goal setting and detailing what I would really do with my time if I had the financial freedom to do it, I began looking back and beginning to understand why I have been struggling with attaining inner peace in my life. Where I want to go and what I have been doing with the free time I have not been CONGRUENT. I capitalize congruent because I believe living a congruent life is key to success. Let's substitute harmony, harmonious for congruent and you'll know what I mean.

Dave's Incongruency.....Example: I love to play golf. I love the competition of golf. But golfing is not helping me achieve my goals. Golf, as much as I love to play, is not helping me get to where I am going and make a difference. So, my time spent golf is not congruent with my goals. In actuality, I add more stress to my life by playing golf and not effectively using my time. Since I started The Challenge, I have cut back playing to one day a week and will cut that back further.

I imagine all us have our escapes from 'reality'; happy hour, TV, movies, gambling, etc. And for those who have everything they want and have their inner piece, congratulations. For those of us who 'escape' to these places, we will constantly struggle for true happiness.

What are your dreams? Values? Is your time spent congruent with what your want in this life?

A SPECIAL REQUEST FOR VETERANS AND PATRIOTS

Ben Stein, you know, from the show Win Ben Stein's Money, wrote a very compelling article I read earlier this week. The article was THE BEST INVESTMENT YOU'LL EVER MAKE.
Thinking I was going to read about stocks, etc. I read an article about how an organization is trying to help families of deceased veterans with their financial affairs. Lori and I have made a donation to this group and I encourage all you out there to please read Ben Stein's article at http://finance.yahoo.com/columnist/article/yourlife/7771. After you read the article visit the Tragedy Assistance Program for Survivors (TAPS) at www.taps.org.

THE PINEAPPLE

The pineapple, a symbol of hospitality, is my feature picture for this blog. I want everyone to know they are always welcome to my home and in my life. Please say hello! Email me, call me, send me smoke signals. And please, visit us when you get a chance.

With Open Arms,

Dave

p.s. Lost 10 pounds since I started The Challenge!!!

2006-07-16T18:12:00.000-07:00

Lone Star Engraving

Hope everyone has had a wonderful week and enjoyed some time off this weekend. The weather here in the Houston area has been extremely hot with high humidity.

I referred to Lone Star Engraving in one of my earlier posts. Today I figured out how to use my new camera and have downloaded a couple of pictures. The picture you see here in the blog is a shower door I did for a business associate. He wanted a lighthouse with his anniversary date. This has been one of my bigger projects to date. Soon I'll have my website up and running and will have many more pictures to show.

I have a carved rock listed on www.ebay.com for all interested in taking a look. It is the Texas Lone Star carved on limestone. (Searh for "Texas Lone Star Rock).

Soon I'll have much more on EBAY, so keep looking. Sarah will be going to college in a couple of years and it will help towards her tuition. Anyone wanting anything specialty made, please let me know. I'll be glad to help you out.

A friend of mine wanted was interested in a book I recently read, it is the Mutliple Streams of Internet Income by Robert Allen. If anyone is interested in starting an internet business this is a must read. Hit the link I provided, get the book, and get started today with your internet business.

Folks, have a great day......and JUST SAY HELLO!!!!

2006-07-12T17:17:00.000-07:00

MOVING DAY

In the great game of golf, there is a day in a four day tournament that is coined ‘moving day’. That day is the third day of the tournament and it’s typically on Saturday. During the first two days, approximately 140 players attempt to ‘make the cut’. After the second day, all the scores are turned in, and somewhere around 50% of the field qualifies for the next two days, which means they will get a paycheck and have a chance to win the trophy.

Saturday is ‘moving day’. Moving day is the day you either play yourself into contention for the grand prize, the ultimate objective, the winner’s trophy. If you play average, others will surpass you and have much better odds in their favor going into Sunday. If you play poorly, most likely you will fall well behind the field and never catch up. If you play well, you most keep yourself ‘in the hunt’ and have a better chance of winning.

One can’t win the tournament on Saturday, but you can play yourself out of it for sure. Saturday is all about playing well enough to stay in contention to win the tournament.

In life we all come across those moments in life I like to relate to ‘moving day’ in golf. We play ourselves out of contention. We play so so, and in doing so let other get ahead of us and it makes it harder to win. Or, we play well and put ourselves in position where a win is within our grasp. It’s all about the decisions we make on which shot to hit, and how well we execute that shot.
Yesterday felt ‘moving day’ for me in my Challenge. I finalized my decision to leave my current company and start in a new direction by tendering my resignation. It would be easy to stay status quo, keep in the middle of the pack, and go on doing the same. Now is the time to break out rather than stay in the middle of the pack.

Over the next several months I still have a lot of shots to hit.

2006-07-09T12:02:00.000-07:00

PLAYING POSSUM

After getting to bed about 1:00am this morning, I was wide awake at 5:30a.m. I told my wife I would try and sleep late so she could sleep without getting bothered, but I couldn’t stay in bed. So about 6:30, I showered and dressed and was ready to work on my Challenge. Getting up early is in my blood, but staying up late is not typical. I am usually asleep by 9:30pm. The Challenge has my blood flowing again.

Anyway, I had a project to complete, and I needed to get it done. I do glass etching and rock carving. The business is Lone Star Engraving. I sandblast designs on shower doors, mirrors, rocks, etc. I had a customer who wanted his shower door designed with a lighthouse and I wanted to get it to him this weekend.

As I was headed out to my shop about 6:45am, I looked in the trash can and saw an opossum in the bottom of the trash can. The plastic trash can stands about 3 ½ feet high, and about two feet in diameter. Needless to say I was quite startled.

The possum didn’t move an inch. It looked like he may have jumped from a tree close to the trash can to get in, and as smooth and hard as the plastic was on the inside, it looks like the poor creature was stuck in there. How long, who knows. But possums being nocturnal creatures and it had been daylight for an hour or so, I assume he had been in there for a while.

To facilitate the possums return to its family, I tipped the can over so he could walk on out and go home. To my amazement, the possum just stayed there. Frozen.

It made me think, did the possum not hurriedly scamper out possibly because it tried all night and couldn’t and now was resigned to being stuck?

As I thought about why the possum didn’t run off I tried to relate it’s situation to many that we face as individuals. Do we stay stuck in a place, a rut, because we have tried many times before to get out but we didn’t? An even when the opportunities have presented themselves, did we not take them because we might have been comfortable in the rut, and the road wasn’t as bumpy? Or maybe we didn’t have the confidence to just step out and Challenge ourselves.
Whatever reason, sometimes we are trapped, sometime trapped and don’t even know it. Sometimes situations present themselves and we don’t pursue them because we are bound by our habits, negative thoughts, and acceptance of the status quo. Most all of us can use a Challenge. I have created my own.

As for the possum, I ended up giving the little thing a little help. I ended up tipping the can upside down forcing the possum out and it ran back off into the shrubs. After a little research on possums at www.opossum.org/facts.htm I realized that maybe the possum was just ‘playing possum’, something they do when they are scared.

The shower door turned out excellent, and if I can get my pictures downloaded I will share them with you.

Two books I’ve read which have helped me shape my life and be more positive are Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill and Your Erroneous Zones by Wayne Dyer. If you are looking for a charge in your life which will make a positive change, read them.

Until my next entry, pursue your dreams!

Dave

2006-07-08T19:57:00.000-07:00

We all come to crossroads in our lives where we make decisions to go one way or the other. Sometimes we realize we are at the crossroads and make a conscious decision which way we go, other times we've been at the crossroads and never realized it, blind to the choice we just made.

Those decisions, or lack of them, put us on certain paths in our life. Sometimes the ride is smooth, sometimes bumpy. Often we mistake the smooth ride as the path to be on, when in reality if we had the patience to ride out the rough spots we would be much more fulfilled in our travels.

So here I am.......on "a" path, but not the one taking me where I want to go. I have been spinning my wheels, not using my talents, and wasting time. I've been too 'comfortable'.

I am changing direction, and will blaze a new trail. To do this, I must drop some habits and spend my time more wisely. I have procrastinated long enough on accomplishing some things I want to get done in my life. This leads me to challenge myself to take myself off this path and accomplish more in the next several months than I have in the past five years.

I know what my goals are. I have the motivation. I have the talent. The ingredient to make it happen is ACTION.

My Challenge is get is to position myself on the path of financial independence, not tied to a traditional job, and use my creativity working for me. This is what I want to accomplish by September 13, 2007.

a. Manuscript complete on my novel.
b. Song written and sold.
c. Short aviation book written and sold.
d. Retired.
e. Successful internet business.
f. Successful option trading / licensed agent.
g. Lose 20% of my weight through better eating and exercise.

I plan on using this blog to chronicle my life as the events unfold as I push toward my goals. My next entry will update where I am on the goals to date.

P.S. That's a picture of my girls, Rebecca and Sarah.

P.S.S. If you haven't read the One Minute Millionare yet, it is a must read. I provided a link for you. THIS IS A MUST READ!!!!