Lessons From a Four-Year-Old

“You have powers you never dreamed of. You can do things you never thought you could do. there are no limitations in what you can do except the limitations of your own mind.” Darwin P. Kingsley

LESSONS FROM A FOUR-YEAR-OLD

She was four years old playing upstairs with our neighbors daughter in their third floor apartment. The phone rang and Lori answered it. Lori was quiet, listening, turning quickly, and looking at me with wide-open eyes that told me something was wrong. She hung up the phone, then bolted out our first floor apartment and headed upstairs.

“Sarah is hurt!” was all I heard.

I stayed behind with our newborn daughter Rebecca anxiously waiting for Lori to bring Sarah down. She came through the door with Sarah in her arms and a cloth on her forehead where she was bleeding. She fell and banged her head between the eyebrow and hairline on her forehead.

After fumbling through wallets and finding numbers to call our HMO to let them know we had to take our daughter into the emergency room, and a fight it was, we finally got loaded up and went to the Lower Bucks Hospital in Bristol, PA. The wait to see the doctor wasn’t as long of an experience an emergency room visit can be. But after the doctor saw her, he wanted to call in a plastic surgeon that would do a better job stitching her up. He didn’t want to leave a big scar, especially a young girl he said. So we waited for a plastic surgeon to be called in.

The three of us waited and talked. We left Rebecca with our neighbor. We were constantly assuring Sarah everything would be okay, and maybe reassuring ourselves. When the plastic surgeon arrived and it was time for Sarah to get stitched up, we were asked to remain outside and wait.

Impatiently and nervously waiting, I continued badgering Lori how something like this can happen. I worked in a chemical plant, and it was drilled in me accidents don’t happen. I looked to blame someone on how a four-year-old could fall off a plastic indoor slide and bang her head. My baby was hurt.

They finally walked out. The doctor said she’ll be fine and there will be little signs of a scar in the future. There were no tears in her eyes and she proudly boasted, “Daddy, I didn’t cry!”

I can’t remember how Lori or I responded, but I remember Sarah telling us “I thought happy thoughts!”

Today I think back today and can’t recall if we coached her to prepare for the stitches while in the waiting room, or it was something previously she had learned. What sticks out in my mind today is the power of that four-year-old’s mind to control her thoughts not to cry and think happy things to overcome a traumatic incident for a kid that age.

I was reminded of this incident a few weeks ago when I received a text message from now a 16-year-old who was in school not feeling well. She wanted to come home with a few classes left. I was trying to convince her to stay, and learn to ‘suck it up.” Then it came over me, and I texted, ‘Think happy thoughts.”

I received somewhat of a smart comment back, but the text messages stopped and she stayed the rest of the day.

Reflecting on this whole situation, I look at the innocence of a child and the strength of the mind to overcome adversity. A strong imagination which can convince the mind of most anything. As we get older, our ability to control our thoughts, and in essence affect our happiness in life, is diminished.

For whatever reason, whether it is the hard knocks of reality that hits us, negative influence from others, whatever reason, we don’t use our minds to our advantage. We let life condition our mind to our disadvantage. We know all the reasons why we can’t do something. We become risk adverse.

Everyone has heard the expression; “TRUE HAPPINESS LIES WITHIN EACH ONE OF US.” Take control of your thoughts and you take control of your life. Is it easy? Nope. Just like losing weight, you have to work on it every day.

……and maybe start thinking like a four-year-old again.